


harmless

by wyverntail



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Byleth Stop Running™, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Flashbacks, Halloween Shenanigans, Hapivain Agenda™, It's not felileth if there isn't oral, Modern AU, Mutual Pining, Post-Break Up, This Fic Runs On Coffee™, U want some pirate felileth?, We Broke Up and Now We're Pining™, We all know where this is going lol, exes but they're Fine™, felix has a cat, tags will update
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:28:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 28,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27682888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wyverntail/pseuds/wyverntail
Summary: Byleth is back in Fhirdiad after leaving everything behind months ago. What she doesn't expect during her short visit, is to stay at her ex's place for the night.But it would be harmless, right?What could go wrong?
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/My Unit | Byleth, Sylvain Jose Gautier/Hapi
Comments: 30
Kudos: 57





	1. should be letting you go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh god, this thing has been a beast eating away at me. 
> 
> i hope you guys enjoy? lol 
> 
> even if you don't, enjoy some smut in chapter three when it's posted. lolol. 
> 
> i just need this OUT OF MY BRAIN.

When taking her new job, Byleth didn't expect to miss the city so much. 

She'd grown up continuously on the move. Every year, a new teaching position with her father at a brand new school in a city she'd never been to before. That was just how her life was. But after deciding to spend her college years in the City of Fhirdiad going to the prestigious Fhirdiad University, she'd apparently learnt to love the constant sound of car tires in rain puddles, sirens off in the distance, and idle chatter in the streets. 

It wasn't really a huge surprise when she'd found herself following a similar path to her father. They'd always been kindred spirits who enjoyed the freedom of change and choice, the ability to explore and learn new things while keeping several precious things close. Though it was true that a city as large as Fhirdiad was ever-changing, something about staying in one place just didn't sit right with her as of late.

As usual, when travelling for work, Byleth had no idea where she would stay for the night. And as usual, she would always figure it out somehow. Whether it was sucking it up and paying for a nice hotel for a night or staying at some shitty ratty motel, she'd make it work. 

Now, the obvious thing to do would be to call her college friends and ask for a place to crash. But that would be too easy. And that would mean they knew she was in town. And that would give them ammo and reason to ask about _him._

She didn't want to talk about _him._

It had been nearly four and a half months, and she'd been doing just fine without them prying into their personal lives for the gritty details of their failed relationship. The silence of focusing on herself was what she needed at the moment, and she intended on it staying that way.

There wasn't anything to talk about, anyway.

Her heeled boots clicked on the concrete sidewalks as she walked through the misty autumn rain, willing herself to think about anything else. 

It was difficult not to. This city was riddled with them. 

She passed the record shop on Mittelfrank Boulevard, where they spent too much time finding the strangest album covers they could bring home and critique as if they knew anything. Dorothea continuously teased them about the competition because of their intensity in the store, glaring at each other over rows of records, but they had fun with it. 

There was the park off Aegis Avenue, where they'd spent many summer afternoons near the pond with a very unfriendly goose. Sure, all of the ducks were lovely, but this goose had something out for them. Several possessions were stolen, including Ignatz's glasses, which everyone thought was hilarious. Though, Dimitri insisted on befriending the menace. It didn't go well until they met Marianne, who took the reigns on the situation and got the glasses back. She even managed to pet the damn thing. 

Aread **bar** on Hauteclere Street heard far too many drunken karaoke nights from their friend group. If she had to be honest, she could've gone for a Dimitri and Sylvain ballad at the moment. They were always such a terrible, beautiful mess, and she loved every minute of it. She knew a part of _him_ did, too, even though _he_ rolled his eyes the whole time. 

Her phone began to vibrate violently in her pocket, ripping her from her thoughts entirely. Thank, Sothis. But Byleth read the name, and immediately, her heart sank. 

Just the five letters she didn't want to see. 

_Felix._

What kind of fucked up coincidence was this?

Byleth considered not answering it, just turning the phone off, or hell might as well toss the whole phone completely. It had been nearly the entire four months since she'd heard from him at all. But still, a part of her was drawn. Still, she had to know why he was calling. Still, a tiny piece of her ached to hear his voice.

Fuck it.

"Hello?"

A silence hung over the line as mild static buzzed in her ear. She almost thought Felix was going to hang up before he finally answered. 

"Hey."

Byleth found herself stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, staring at the concrete as she tried to find the words to reply. Some jerk ran into her arm and nearly knocked her over, yelling expletives at her for being in the way, but she could hardly be bothered. 

He really called. 

"You're back in the city?" He asked, and she heard shuffling on the other side. At least he was feeling awkward, too. 

"Yeah." 

Another pause, another feedback silence. 

"Listen," Felix started, letting out an anguished sigh. "Claude told me you were coming, and you didn't have a place to stay." 

Byleth swore under her breath, bringing her other hand up to rub at her temples. What the hell was Claude doing calling Felix and telling him that she had nowhere to go? He'd be getting an earful from her later. 

"I don't need somewhere to stay, I'm fi—"

"It's just one night, Byleth." 

Fuck him for saying her stupid name like that.

One night in her ex's apartment. 

Sounded like a bad idea if she'd ever heard one.

"I can find a hotel. My work offers reimbursements for travel, but I'm sure Claude didn't mention that." 

"And I'm sure your job only reimburses for the shitty hotels that are over-run with rats." 

Felix wasn't wrong about that. They'd made the unfortunate drunk decision to stay at a shitty motel next to Athame's Restaurant and Bar one too many nights during college. It would be nice to keep her shoes without holes and bite marks with her current financial situation. It would also be nice to wake up without a rat in the bathtub.

"You hate rats, Byleth."

"I know that, Felix." 

His name felt foreign coming out of her mouth.

Closing her eyes, she leaned against the wet concrete building behind her and sighed. Rain tapped on the sidewalks as rhythmically as the sound of the clicking heels of people quickly walking by. Cars were driving through the accumulated water with windshield wipers on, filled with people presumably going home during rush hour. It only exacerbated her urge to go somewhere familiar. 

How bad could it be? 

One night. 

They could deal with each other for that long. Byleth could deal with him for one night and not make it difficult. They could completely ignore each other. Byleth could chat with Sylvain if he was around, and maybe Hapi, too, if she showed up as she usually did. It would be easy. She picked out his couch, after all. It was the best thing she'd ever slept on other than his bed, which she also picked out. 

The couch would absolutely do.

No rats. 

Only a very recent ex-boyfriend who she definitely wasn't still in love with.

"Fine." Byleth breathed, opening her eyes to the busy streets once more. She thought she could hear a relieved sigh on the other side of the line, but perhaps it was just the connection. 

"What street are you on?" The rustling on the other side of the line intensified as she could only assume Felix was getting up to grab his coat. 

"Gremory." 

"I'll meet you at Gaspard and Archer." 

The line cut immediately, leaving her staring into the street stone-faced. 

Looking back at her phone, she swallowed hard at the sight of her home screen. Still, she hadn't had the heart to change it from the snapshot of them. Dorothea had insisted on taking a picture of everyone in Aymr Park when they joined for their yearly picnic. After Ignatz painstakingly set up the tripod to fit everyone in one shot, set the timer, and ran to join the photo, Byleth took the chance to whisper something stupid in Felix's ear. It resulted in a series of five pictures of him showing off his rarely captured smile.

Sylvain gave her shit for cropping mostly everyone else out many times, but she couldn't give a fuck. It was pixellated, grainy, and perfect. 

She _had_ to change that photo.

It was fine.

It'd be harmless.

She'd be with Felix for just over twelve hours, and then she'd be on her way back to Derdriu.

Willing her feet to move forward, she began to walk towards the subway station, trying to ignore the fact she was passing the same bar they'd had one of their first conversations at all those years before. 

~

_"Hey, there."_

A voice came from beside them down the bar that belonged to a tall redhead with a charming smile. The guy was leaning up against the bar beside Hapi like he'd done it a million times before. From how comfortable he looked, it wouldn't have surprised Byleth at all. She'd never seen his face at this bar, and she and Hapi had been frequenting it for at least two months now.

"Hey, Penny." Hapi traced a delicate finger around the rim of her glass. Byleth had to shake her head at that one. Where did she come up with these nicknames?

"Penny?" 

"Like a copper penny."

"Cause I'm gonna get lucky?" The guy asked with a wink. 

"Eugh. Never mind," Hapi said with a look of disgust. "Just copper. Dull, boring, go green in the elements copper." 

"Hey, I'm right here," Byleth complained, narrowing her eyes at her friend.

"No, you're like fresh flowers, Chatterbox." 

"Pft." She scoffed, taking a sip of her drink.

"Is he bothering you?" A disinterested voice came from beside her now. 

"Yes." Hapi deadpanned, spinning on her bar stool.

"No," Byleth turned to face a somewhat familiar set of amber eyes and a frown. Where did she know them from? 

"Hey, didn't you two almost kiss? I'd recognize that mint hair of yours anywhere," The tall redhead asked from across the counter. A mischievous smirk was spreading across his lips as he watched his dark-haired friend frown even more, if that was possible. 

And then it clicked. 

Back a few weeks ago, Dorothea had generously offered to attend a baseball game with her. Byleth had secured tickets to see the Fhirdiad Blue Lions against the Enbarr Black Eagles nearly a year beforehand, intending to go with her father. Unfortunately, that didn't get to happen, but her friend was doing more than enough tagging along to a sports game that she had no interest in. 

At the said game, their seats ended up being next to some people Dorothea knew from school. Two blondes, who sat furthest from them who she waved at, the redhead who she chatted with animatedly the whole time, and the dark-haired grumpy guy she was forced to sit beside. The two of them weren't even introduced to each other; Dorothea and the redhead were in such deep conversation about Goddess knew what. Either way, she remembered how awkward it was sitting there in complete silence with someone she didn't know who was clearly agitated with his friend. 

And then the worst part happened. 

Because they were sitting between the friends who were chatting away, whoever was operating the fucking camera to do the idiotic games in between plays decided it would be a good idea to put the kiss cam on them. 

_Them._

The redhead pointed it out, laughing loudly as he shoved his grumpy friend's arm playfully. He folded his arms over his chest and told him to shut the fuck up, rightfully so. Byleth wasn't about to kiss a stranger like that. It was ridiculous they even did this stupid camera thing anyway because of reasons precisely like this. 

"Oh, come on!" Dorothea teased, looking over at the redhead with those sultry eyes of hers.

Dorothea and her friend ended up standing up and leaning over the two of them, giving each other a disgusting kiss far too close for comfort as some of the crowd started cheering. Byleth could remember the guy beside her trying to shove his friend away, telling him how gross he was to participate and not respect personal space. Sounded like this shit happened more than he cared for.

Once the two sat down again, Byleth remembered scanning the crowd for the camera, looking directly into the barrel and drawing a line over her neck for them to cut it out. It earned a few chuckles from the crowd that she didn't care for.

Thankfully they did cut the cameras; otherwise, Byleth thought the guy beside her would've imploded.

But Dorothea never let her forget it after that. 

"Chatterbox, you never told me that story." Hapi turned to her with a slightly raised brow, clearly interested in this almost kiss. 

"We were at a baseball game, the stupid kiss cam people chose us, and they obviously chose wrong." Byleth rolled her eyes, grabbing her drink from the bar top and taking a sip. "Why the fuck do they still do those anyway?" 

"Fucking asking for a problem." The dark-haired male glared at his friend, who was chuckling now. 

"Oh, come on, Fe, it would've been fun." 

"I don't know her." 

Hapi snorted beside Byleth, grabbing at her drink. 

"What's your name?" The redhead asked, leaning forward enough to lock his warm brown eyes with hers.

"Byleth." 

"Well, it's nice to meet you for a second time, Byleth. I'm Sylvain, and this is," Holding his hand out towards his friend, he raised his brows with an expectant look. 

He sighed loudly, rolling his liquid amber eyes. "Felix."

_Felix._

Well, that didn't suit him very well with his frown and all. 

"This is my roommate, Hapi." 

"Hapi—" The guy called Sylvain repeated, bringing a hand to his chest. 

Oh no.

"Don't even start, Copper." 

"What do you mean? I was just going to say—" 

"Nope." Her friend poked his chest with stern eyes that told him to sit down. 

The two turned away to continue bantering, which left Byleth with the one named Felix. Could things be more awkward between them if she wanted them to be? Probably. But she was hoping to remedy that.

She at least knew one common interest.

"So, you team Lions or Eagles?" 

He shrugged half-heartedly before Sylvain looked over his shoulder and shouted, "Lions!" 

Byleth raised a slight brow at that, curious as to what the situation was here. A secret fanboy? He didn't quite seem like the type, but now she was interested. 

"Is that just because of proximity?" Byleth asked, watching his eyes roll slightly. That colour of amber was warm and inviting in the dim glow of the bar lights. She wished he would come closer. 

"No, I've been here my whole life." He stated as if it was the obvious answer. Felix granted Byleth the wish of coming closer by sitting at the stool next to her, leaning on his hand as he stared at his drink. Though she couldn't see his eyes any closer, he sure was nice to look at. Sharp features were softened only slightly by the strands of dark hair that framed his face. "Why, who's your team?"

"The Lions, because of my father. But I kind of like the Eagles," Byleth held back a smirk as she watched his shoulder tense up just a tad. "I do enjoy the Golden Deer as well; they've been doing better the past couple of years.

Alright, so he was a secret fan. 

It was amusing to watch the fans in Fhirdiad squirm when she told them her opinions, honestly. They were all so loyal and adamant about their favourites that it made for a hilarious conversation when she got into the actual stats. Thanks to Jeralt, she'd read every baseball magazine and heard every game on the radio her whole life. Random baseball stats were like a second language tucked into the back of her mind. 

Was she going to have fun with this new guy tonight? 

"Neither of them have come anywhere close to winning in at least a decade." 

"The Eagles have gotten to the playoffs countless times; what are you talking about?" 

Now she was a little bit taken aback. 

"And they've lost. Every time the Eagles are down by at least four points by the ninth." Felix pointed out.

Alright, he might actually be into some shit.

"But have you seen their lineup?" Byleth raised a brow, testing the waters with their team stats. 

"Catherine is like a god out there, and with Shamir on the Lions this year throwing curveballs, no one is going to be hitting any baseballs. " 

Well, okay, then. Felix knew the players by name. 

He had a point with Shamir. She threw a fantastic curveball. 

But there were other players he wasn't giving much credit to.

"You can't argue that someone named 'the Death Knight' isn't a good player, though." She argued, referring to one of the Black Eagles star players. He had a habit of breaking baseball bats faster than any of the other players.

"I didn't say he wasn't _good,_ " Felix shook his head and sighed. "He can't be bringing that much "death" if he keeps losing when it counts the most." 

Oh. 

_Now it was on._

~

Byleth and Felix spent the rest of the evening comparing and contrasting players on various teams. Felix strongly asserted that the Lions had the superior players even if there were some stand out stars on other teams. She wasn't quite sure how their conversations dove into other topics, but by the end of the night, the four of them had managed to set up another meeting at the bar for the next week.

A few months later, she found out his late brother, Glenn, had actually played on the college team. Much like herself, the game they'd gone to had been the first since losing someone with who Felix enjoyed baseball. For Byleth, her father. For Felix, his brother. It ended up being something that brought them together throughout their friendship, and ultimately their relationship. 

They'd often catch games and argue with each other about players at the bar instead of paying attention to their friends. 

She hadn't really watched a game since.

Shoving the memory of that night out of her mind, Byleth climbed the subway station's stairs with her usual confidence. She wasn't about to crumble at the mere fact she was meeting up with Felix again after months. It wasn't that big of a deal. They were adults. They could manage.

They broke up, and these things happened all the time. Byleth needed to get away from this city and go somewhere new. It was how she had lived the majority of her life with her father anyway; moving to various parts of the continent whenever a job caught his eye. This style of living worked for them, and though she realized how different of a lifestyle it was once she finally got to college, staying in one place didn't suit her, she figured. So far, she wasn't completely sold on the fact, but she was getting there. Byleth was managing just fine without everything she'd come to know well after staying in the city for the past five years. 

Except there _he_ was. 

Utterly unbothered by the rush of people milling by him, Felix kept his amber gaze on her as he waited against the concrete building. She couldn't exactly read his reaction to seeing her again, but she could sure feel her heart beating hard against her chest. He stood attentive as ever, hands shoved into the pockets of his black coat as she weaved through the individuals making their way home for the night.

Maybe his hair looked a tad shorter, but of course, Felix looked the same.

It was only four months, even if it felt like a lifetime.

What was she expecting?

"Hi." She breathed as she approached him, readjusting her bag. She made a conscious effort to ignore the way her arms wanted to reach out and wrap around him. 

Byleth wondered if he still used the same cologne that smelled like fresh rain.

"Hi." 

It was so lovely to hear his voice in person instead of in her memory. 

Felix gave her a disappointed look, and she frowned right back.

"What?"

"Is that all you brought?" 

Looking down at her outfit, she didn't see anything wrong with it. Byleth managed to dig her leather jacket out from the piles of boxes that still needed to be unpacked. She wore a short-sleeved black blouse artfully tucked into jeans. Her heeled boots didn't add to the outfit's comfortability, but they got the job done. Byleth was there for a conference, not some gala. She felt good; that's what mattered.

"I'm here for one day; what's the point?" 

"And you were going to sleep in what, exactly?" 

"Nothing." She shrugged as she began to walk, passed him in the direction of his apartment building. 

"You left clothes at my place, anyway." He mumbled behind her, though she chose to ignore it. If she remembered correctly, the only pieces of clothing she actually left at his house was a drawer full of half-broken lingerie and maybe a few t-shirts. 

That wouldn't be very helpful for this evening. 

Though her entire body was buzzing from the interaction, Byleth felt herself going into autopilot as she came to a stop at the street corner, the routine of the path returning as if she'd never left. Many nights stumbling to Felix's apartment after studying too long at the library or after a night out ingrained the steps perfectly in her mind. She could probably do it with her eyes closed if she wanted to, from multiple subway stops. That was… sort of annoying.

Felix caught up shortly, bumping his shoulder into hers as he tried to keep near her on the busy corner sending a shock through her arm. He seemed to feel the same way about it, taking a step back even as she heard his signature sigh. 

"What are you even here for?"

What was with the small talk?

They didn't do that crap.

"A conference," She shrugged, beginning to move again as stoplights turned red—no point in waiting for the walk sign. The cars on the street rushed past them, splashing through dirty puddles of rain as people scrambled on by. 

"They sent you here for one day for a conference?" 

Oh. Of course, Felix was interested in the semantics of it all now, she thought because he had to help make decisions to send employees off to various cities to do just the same. Was it worth it for only a day? Probably not, in her opinion. Definitely not for her job. 

She was a travelling lecturer for a company, for Goddess sake. It didn't make sense to send her anywhere because she was already travelling so much. The obvious option would be to send her to one when she was already in the city, and yet here she was. 

One day with Felix, apparently.

"Employee development, they always want us to brush up on our communication skills." She explained, weaving through several people, nearly running into them. Verbal communication skills could be laughable in context with Felix, but she would let it slide. 

"What do you even do for your job?" 

Had she not told him before? Guilt spread through Byleth's gut as her eyes connected with the sidewalk, choosing to focus on where her feet were landing. The rain pooled in the cracks of the concrete, and it was much more interesting than focusing on the guilt. 

"I travel to different schools and give lessons on various topics. Sometimes I stay for a couple weeks, sometimes it's only a few days. Depends on their needs and what they want to teach their students." She wasn't exactly putting her degree to use, but it was getting the job done for the moment, and it got her the freedom she wanted. "I don't understand why they sent me here for a one-day communication conference, but I'm not going to complain over a free trip."

Someone on their cell phone talking loudly walked straight in between the two of them, causing them to jump apart. Felix glared at the back of the person's head as they walked away, completely unaware, reminding Byleth of how personally focused many people were in Fhirdiad. 

That was a part of Derdriu he absolutely loved so far when she was around. The lack of so many rude people who got in your space was refreshing.

That and the canals were nice. 

The ocean. 

The silence. 

"I thought you wanted to get away from here." 

Byleth shot him a glare, and Felix shrugged. 

"I don't hate the city." 

_I don't hate you either,_ she finished in her head.

Thank Sothis, he left it at that as they continued to walk the final block. 

As they approached the corner of his building, Byleth felt herself slowing down to look at the local coffee shop she came to love so much. If there was one thing she really missed, it was Bean's. Nothing could beat their strong black coffee in the morning, and she'd indulged in one too many staying over at Felix's apartment so many nights. Every morning she'd go down and get several cups, much to his annoyance. 

_"We have a coffee machine."_ He'd say. 

And she'd reply, _"You don't have Bean's magic,"_ to earn a very defeated eye roll. 

He couldn't even argue it. 

Byleth had one indulgence she completely spoiled herself with, and he chose to poke fun at her for it at every chance. Her clothes would be tattered, and Felix would suggest buying new ones, but she wouldn't. Byleth insisted on making homemade meals as much as possible with the ridiculously expensive take-out options near Felix's apartment, being in the city's wealthier sector. She'd even been kind enough to go wife mode and make him _and_ Sylvain packed lunches. But no. They had to tease her for the one thing she truly loved in this world.

Whether they were actually in the coffee shop studying surrounded by their book collection or back up in his apartment tangled up on the couch, rain or snow, Bean's was there for them. 

Man, she could go for a coffee.

"We can stop by in the morning if you want," Felix muttered beside her, walking past the large glass window of the shop. 

"Have you finally converted?" 

"Hell no." He scoffed, shaking his head. "In fact, since you left, I've saved probably… a hundred and twenty dollars a week not going to this café. What would that be then…" He paused, doing the math in his head. "Around two-thousand dollars the past four months? I think I'm good, not going." 

He wasn't even generous, adding in the price of a morning muffin. 

Whatever.

Alright, the price was ridiculous.

But the _city taxes._

**_The coffee._ **

"Oh, I'm so happy you've been saving your money, you poor broke soul." She rolled her eyes, feeling only a pang of guilt at the statement. Glancing in his direction, she swore she could see the hint of a grin. 

Fuck. 

She could feel her stomach flip.

He was still completely gorgeous. 

And she needed to stop joking around with him. That was a slippery slope they would never recover from if she didn't quit while she was at it. To hold back felt almost painful, tip-toeing around the real things she wanted to dive into since she had the chance instead of this stupid generalized conversation. She didn't want to talk about stupid work or how the other was doing. 

Only twelve or so more hours of this, and she would be out of his hair forever. 

Felix held the door to the apartment building open, and the mundane familiarity washed over her all at once. The citrus fragrance of the lobby as they walked to the elevator permeated her senses like a warm blanket welcoming her back to one of the only homes she'd ever known. 

How many times had she walked the same path, sober or not? The people at the front desk even knew her name at some point, and that was something she had never experienced before coming to Fhirdiad. Being a regular. Being recognized and familiar. 

When the elevator came, she tucked herself into the corner, folding her arms over her chest to keep herself from feeling the memories of all the times they'd definitely made out in this same lift. Thankfully, he stood in her periphery on the other side, though she did wonder what he was thinking. 

Did he want to reach out too? 

No, she fucking broke his heart whether he said it or not. 

Staring forward, she watched the numbers change, the electric hum and soft piano music filling the small space. It only made her fast-beating heart feel more pronounced in her chest as she tried to calm her thoughts. 

21

22

23

24

25 - _Ding!_

Byleth nodded him out of the elevator first, following him down the hall like she had so many times before. She kept her arms tightly wrapped around herself, suppressing the urge to reach out and slide her hands around him, unable to wait to touch him until they were in the apartment. How many times had they spent several minutes taking this second's long walk to the door? 

Every part of her body was humming with a missing ache. 

Maybe this was a terrible idea. 

Maybe she should just turn around now and make an apology for it later. 

As he stood at the door with the key, she strongly considered it. 

But the second he swung it open, turning back to her with those amber eyes of his, she really couldn't say no. 

And so, she took a step inside. 

Immediately she was greeted with the homey scent of vanilla, chosen by none other than Sylvain, much to Felix's dislike. It wasn't that he didn't love the vanilla; it was just so sweet. Byleth didn't mind one bit. 

Her eyes scanned her surroundings in the foyer, where everything was more or less exactly the same as before. If anything, things seemed a little bit more displaced than usual, which was odd considering Sylvain was such a neat freak. 

And sure as day, Byleth could hear soft meows coming from the other room, immediately picking up her annoyingly sentimental mood. Screw Bean's. The one thing she missed in Fhirdiad more than anything was Felix's cat, Sabre. 

"Hey, you," Byleth said softly, crouching with her hand out to the fluffy beast. She was one of the largest cats she'd ever seen, with dark paws and striped markings on her forehead. Her soft pointed ears always made Byleth think of a horned owl when she was perched on the cat tree in the middle of the night, her wide grey-green eyes tracking every movement down below on the street. 

"Hey," Felix complained, watching his cat completely ignore him as she struts on by.

Sucker. 

Sabre loved her.

She immediately rubbed her face up against Byleth's hand, arching her back as she pressed into her for more pets. Her soft fur behind her ears was a comfort, remembering the countless nights Sabre had spent curled up in her lap while they were studying or watching ridiculous TV shows. Sabre's purring was loud and an obvious tell of how she was feeling. No, she didn't hold back in letting you know if she was upset or happy. It was one of the things Byleth appreciated about her. 

"Yeah, I missed you, too," She whispered, leaning down to press a quick kiss on her furry head. "You still stealing all of Felix's hair ties?" 

A meow sounded through the narrow hallway, causing Byleth to smile. 

"She owes me at least a hundred dollars at this point," Felix muttered.

Sabre sauntered off at that, flicking her tail against the wall as she walked on by as if she could understand the meaning of Felix's words. She was always a sassy lady, and Byleth appreciated every minute of it. 

Byleth stood back up, feeling her chest tighten the slightest at the view that was all too comfortable. 

How many times had she walked into this same apartment to say hello to his cat, to hang up their coats, and begin cooking dinner? There wasn't any place for her doing that now that she'd come back. This wasn't Byleth's space anymore, even if she'd shared it for the better part of three and a half years of her life.

An overwhelming sense of melancholy washed over her at the realization, feeling her chest get tight with emotions she'd rather do without. 

She could go through the motions of being back, retracing her footsteps like a ghost in a house she was haunting.

Only twelve or so hours, and she would get out of his life again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> been in a super bad writing slump where I've felt like everything I've ever written and everything I'm writing is super shit but hey... i posted a thing for the first time in over a month. 
> 
> super huge thank you to mel and sayl for listening to me ramble lol 
> 
> super huge thanks to mel for letting me bounce random ideas when i got so stuck! and for kiss cam to torture our otp lmfao good stuff. 
> 
> thanks to the felileth server for being inspo as always. y'all are great. 
> 
> random notes: 
> 
> fhirdiad inspired by nyc has been fun to write. used random in-game shit to try to colour the city a bit. thinking of mittelfrank like broadway. dorothea the broadway queen is living in my brain rent free. that's p much it. thank u. 
> 
> i literally just fuckin made up byleth's job idek. teacher who travels. sounded fun.
> 
> for my cat peeps: sabre is a siberian cat. she also comes with 0mg cholesterol. 
> 
> also fuck grammarly for making me try to correct Bean's. Bean's is owned by Mr. Bean. It's his. Fuck u. Leave me alone. It's Correct™.


	2. everything is blurry but you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow life kinda slapped me in the face and said 'YOU SUCK' so. here i am a month and a bit later finally posting this chapter. I'm still not happy with it, I'm sorry. and it's a fucking MONSTER of a chapter, I'm sorry. pls forgive me lmaoo... i hope you enjoy Halloween shenanigans in nearly mid-January. 
> 
> me @ me maybe don't do an unexpected full-time job and a masters at the same time 
> 
> content warning: some oral sex :)

Felix went to take off his coat when his phone began to buzz violently in his pocket, drawing out an annoyed sigh. 

"They can't deal with shit on their own for one night—" He muttered, grabbing his phone from his jacket and looking at her with a vaguely apologetic glance before stalking off towards his bedroom. "What?" 

Now that she was left alone, the sense of intrusion felt even more tangible. 

Byleth undid her boots, placing them neatly at the front instead of tossing them like she usually would have. She hung her leather jacket next to his, where she might have thrown it on the couch before. It felt cold. Sterile. Too formal. 

She pushed through the gnawing numbness in her chest, entering the kitchen with a deep breath. Scanning the room she'd spent so much time in with new eyes, she decided to settle herself at the island, leaning against the granite countertop. Everything generally looked the same from what she could tell in the kitchen. It was tidy, but probably because Felix hadn't used it much. 

It was like a kick in the gut when Byleth came face to face with a memory from years ago. A photo of the first Halloween she'd ever participated in, thanks to her friends, pinned up on a corkboard filled with notes from them. A small smile began to form on her lips at the memory, remembering the pure horror in Sylvain, Dorothea, and Hilda's faces when she'd told them that she never dressed up. 

It was a reaction she was familiar with, having grown up moving around frequently. Instead, she stayed in with Jeralt and watched stupid scary movies that made them laugh. That was enough for her. She just never really saw the point of it if she never ended up making friends with many of the kids she went to school with anyway. That was the whole fun of it, right?

Byleth was proven right when Felix had agreed to participate for the first time in years, according to Sylvain, just because it was _her_ first time. A generous offer from the not-so-festive grinch. And it ended up being one of her favourite memories in the city and with Felix. 

"That was the night you two finally got over yourselves and did something about it," Hapi would say. 

Yeah, it was.

~

_Apparently, Halloween was a very loved holiday in Fhirdiad because when her friends found out she'd never participated, they looked at her like she had two heads._

"What have you always wanted to be?" Dorothea leaned her head on her perfectly manicured hands, batting her eyes with a childish curiosity. The theatre queen was going to have way too much fun with this.

Byleth thought about it for a minute, mulling the options around in her brain. She remembered so many kids her age dressing up as superheroes or princesses. For some reason, it was never appealing to her, the tight suits, or the frilly dresses. None of that was _fun._

She'd always wanted to be out on the open ocean. Endless opportunities for fishing and battles at sea. The thrill of it all.

"A pirate." 

Felix let out a breath he didn't know he was holding in. 

"Alright, I can work with that." He mumbled. "Do we get swords?"

"Did you really just ask that?" Byleth narrowed her green eyes at him. "Of course, we're getting swords." 

"Let's do it." 

With that quick answer from Felix, Dorothea was setting all of the plans in motion. They would shop together to find the perfect matching outfit for the two; everyone would get ready at Dorothea's place and head over to Lorenz Gloucester's house for the party before sundown. It was a whirlwind Byleth wasn't expecting, but one she was sort of enjoying observing, if she had to be honest. Following Felix and Dorothea around into various stores around the city was entertaining despite her dark-haired friend's eye rolls. 

_Friend._

"You know this is a date, right?" Hapi asked, leaning her head on her hands as she watched Byleth fussing with the bishop sleeved blouse Dorothea insisted she bought. It was far too expensive, and she wasn't even sure how to take care of it. Did she need to iron it? Did the wrinkles enhance the look? It was ridiculous. 

And Hapi was ridiculous for insinuating it was a _date._

"It's not a date." 

"He's dressing up for the first time in years, from what Copper has told me, and it's for _you._ " Hapi pointed out with a small knowing grin. 

She hated that grin. It was the _I'm right, Byleth_ grin.

"I never heard the words ' _Byleth, would you like to go on a date with me?'_ so it's not a date," Byleth retorted, swiping her hand down the white shirt again. 

A bout of butterflies began to flutter in her stomach at the thought of spending time with Felix in just a few short nights, and she wished they would just go away. She didn't want to think about it like that. It wasn't something she was used to, nor was it something she thought would happen. 

Even if she _wanted_ it to happen. 

She didn't want to think about how his amber eyes shone under the lights of the coffee shop where Hapi and Sylvain always stranded them. Or the way her eyes lingered on him when he so much as came close to smiling. 

Byleth couldn't say any of that out loud. 

"Whatever, Chatterbox," Hapi sighed, rolling her eyes. "You're not going to spontaneously combust if you give it a chance, you know." 

"And make things awkward between everyone? No." 

"So you admit there's something there." 

" _No._ "

Hapi laughed, resting her head on the countertop. 

"Come on, Chatterbox, Spiky likes you." The redhead tried again, leaning her head on her hand. Why was she pushing it so hard? "Didi can see it, Peggy can see it, even Copper can. They've known him his entire life."

Hapi had a point, and it was an annoying one. Dimitri and Ingrid really noticed...? 

She thought back to only days before, being stranded in the coffee shop together in the middle of the night. The rest of the place had been relatively quiet, but Felix and Byleth had stolen the corner booth near some towering bookshelves, and the seclusion was exactly what they loved about the shop. There was a moment they were sitting in silence, enjoying the music's muffled sounds on the radio, and not feeling the need to speak. The scent of coffee brewed at all hours of the night and pastries baking for the coming day wafted throughout the shop like a warm blanket of comfort. 

Felix had met her eyes with this _look._ One she hadn't seen from him before, where he looked more like he was fighting himself instead of just _saying_ things like he usually did. And he held her eye contact for much, much longer than expected. Byleth didn't want to press, so she waited in anticipation for whatever was on his mind. She could see the gears visibly turning as his hands fiddled with the fork on the table. 

He finally opened his mouth to say something and asked her if she wanted another coffee. 

Byleth would have been lying if she said she wasn't somewhat disappointed. 

But she wasn't worried about whether or not Felix _liked_ her. Byleth was concerned about her ability to provide in… whatever it was. She'd never been a part of something that lasted more than a few months. Nothing more than sex and friendship. 

Byleth wouldn't even let people stay the night. She didn't want to ruin whatever she had going on with him by being an awful partner.

"Look, there's nothing wrong with what you're doing. If you're happy, I support you." Hapi started, rolling her eyes at the somewhat heartfelt comment. "But I also see the way you look at each other, and I think if you're willing to give it a shot, it's worth the chance, Chatterbox." 

Hapi let the conversation drop there, and Byleth was thankful, but the thought of their conversation didn't leave Byleth's mind at all for the coming days. If anything, it made her even more nervous the night of. Their group of friends had decided to get together to get dressed, Dorothea insisting on dressing her and Felix so that their outfits were impeccable. Byleth wasn't quite sure what she meant until she got there.

Standing in front of a full-length mirror, Byleth admired the singer's work. Dorothea had expertly sewn the blouse open to reveal her shoulders, pairing it with a black leather underbust corset with lace-up detailing in the front. She'd also found a gorgeous red crushed velvet skirt to match her fishnet tights and boots they'd chosen together. The woman worked wonders; she had to give her that. 

Even her hair was completely different, the brunette insisting on shoving extensions that didn't even match her mint hair onto her head to increase her 'maximum sex appeal,' whatever that meant, curling the new length into unfamiliar waves. The dark red lip and eyeliner were a bit much for her taste, but it was a look; she'd also give Dorothea that. And, she managed to not make Byleth look like Christmas threw up with her hair and all. 

"I don't think I can open my eyes." 

Felix stood in the doorway, eyes closed and covered in just as much black eyeliner, if not more than hers. In a surprising turn of events, Dorothea had managed to convince him to wear his hair half-down. It was clearly strange for him because he kept switching between tucking it behind his ear and pulling it forward. She wondered what it would be like to run her fingers through his silky locks for the first time…

No, she couldn't think about that.

"You look—" Felix started before getting cut off. 

"Felix, I'm not done with you!" Dorothea sang from the other room. 

"You're done!" He snapped, one amber eye barely opening as he looked down the hallway. 

"Oh, come on, just let me draw just a little bit of stubble or something; you'd look so hot!" 

" _No!_ "

Byleth snorted.

"You'd look like your dad." 

"Okay, enough, when are we leaving?" He tugged at the collar of his black coat with gold detailing. Felix was wearing a similarly poofy white shirt, though apparently, their friend had insisted he unbutton it quite a bit. Byleth would have to thank her for that. She had tied what looked like a teal scarf around his waist, which was a nice touch to bring some colour. 

Dorothea really did a great job with both of them. They looked fancier than she thought they would… But that seemed typical of the theatre princess. She knew what she was doing, obviously. 

"You're missing your sword," Byleth smirked, tossing the plastic weapon over to him. 

Felix caught it at the handle, and quickly, his posture shifted into a fighting stance. A competitive grin was forming on his lips as she grabbed her own plastic sword and came rushing at him with an attack. Of course, swords were the way to his smile.

The swords clicked together with a pathetic tapping sound, much less dramatic than the clashing steel Byleth imagined as she continued her attack down the narrow hallway into the living room. Byleth could see Ingrid on the couch from her periphery, rolling her eyes and throwing her head back as Dimitri pat her shoulder. Sylvain and Hapi were in the kitchen on the other side of them with curious but unsurprised looks on their faces. 

But Byleth was focused on defeating Felix with her plastic sword. 

What could she say? 

If they were given anything remotely sword-like, whether it was a toothpick or a branch, they were going to hash it out. 

She faked him out, pretending she would hit low, making him flinch so she could get easy access to his neck. Pressing the tip of the weapon under his chin, his eyes narrowed with a frustrated grunt. An impressed whistle came from the kitchen, followed by several bouts of laughter. 

"This isn't over," Felix said lowly, sending a shiver of excitement up her spine. Byleth would definitely hold him to that.

"Alright, you swashbucklers, no sword fighting in my living room," Dorothea scolded, waltzing over with two black pirate hats she firmly placed on each of their heads. 

"Do we have to wear hats?" Felix asked.

"Yes." The brunette pinched his cheek and walked away, quickly interjecting before he could oppose. "How else are they supposed to know you're a pirate, Fe?"

"We have swords." He said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

The trip to the party was about as chaotic as expected. Dozens of people were on the streets as the sun was setting on the towering buildings around them in elaborate costumes. The narrow sidewalks forced Byleth to stick close to Felix, their shoulders brushing, hands accidentally touching as they made space for other people to pass. As they filtered into the subway, she felt his hand on her shoulder to not lose her in the crowds of people, sending a small jolt of electricity down her arm. His grip was firm but more gentle than she'd imagined. 

The thought made her cheeks heat up. 

Felix happened to "accidentally" misplace his pirate hat on one of the trains, much to Dorothea's disappointment, and Byleth got fed up with Felix messing with his hair halfway down the street from the party. She earned her wish of gently running her fingers through the silky strands as she took it upon herself to retie it in his usual tail. There were no complaints from Felix as they let the others go ahead of them, already noticing the bunches of people filtering into Lorenz's house. 

"Ready?" She asked, nodding towards the commotion.

"Might as well get it over with." He shrugged, following her down the sidewalk and into the house.

As she entered, the bass from the music reverberated the walls, people standing everywhere chatting and drinking already. Several of their friends were waving as they passed on by, Felix gripping her shoulder again as he tried not to lose her in the crowd. Byleth found herself completely pressed up against his chest at some moments, feeling the heat of his body radiating between them. Every moment they were touching made her heart race faster, and she cursed Hapi for putting these damn thoughts in her head. 

The fact she just wanted to turn around and look at him made her heart want to beat out of her chest. 

Hours passed with people milling in and out of rooms, but Felix and Byleth firmly planted themselves in the corner of the kitchen at a small cut out seat at the window. There was no shortage of places to sneak off to in Lorenz's place, but she had to admit, they chose a good one. Close to the booze, close enough to other conversations to overhear whatever drama was going on, all while staying completely out of it. 

But the real kicker was how fancy the house was. Byleth commented on the ridiculousness of having pillows in a kitchen, and Felix laughed at it, opening up about his own home life. 

"You wouldn't want to see my dad's house outside the city." 

"He has a house _outside_ the city?" 

Felix shrugged a confirmation. 

"It's ridiculous, I agree, but I prefer it to the apartment even if it's far too big for anyone." He paused for a moment, taking in a small breath that she noticed as if he was battling with himself. "Maybe you can stop by during the holidays." 

Stop by during the holidays? Was he inviting her to his father's house in the woods? 

"Would your father be alright with that?" 

Felix shrugged again, looking away from her. "He tends to collect people for the holidays anyway; I'm sure he wouldn't mind. Hapi will be coming this year. And you like fishing, don't you?" 

He remembered that? 

"Yeah." 

"It's on the coast. My father probably wouldn't mind letting you take the boat out." 

"As long as you come with me." She said, elbowing him in the ribs. 

"Nope. Take Sylvain." 

"Wha—" 

"Hey!" A new voice shouted, averting their attention to a familiar plastic sword being pointed in their faces. Caspar stood proudly holding his sword out, floppy velvet hat with a feather sticking out, sitting on top of his blue hair. "Duel us!" 

"You want a duel?" Byleth questioned, raising a brow.

Ashe appeared behind Caspar in a similar outfit, with Linhardt looking indifferent beside him. Clearly, the three of them were dressed like musketeers. It suited the trio, though; Linhardt was never one for getting into anything physical.

"Three against two?" Ashe asked with a playful smirk. Sure, everyone thought he was just the sweetest thing, but Ashe had a mischievous side. Byleth found that out when she'd locked herself out of her apartment, and he had the knowledge to lock pick her door. 

"I am _not_ duelling," Linhardt said, folding his arms over his chest. "It can't even _be_ a duel if there are more than two people."

"I'll go against Felix; Byleth and Caspar can go against each other!" Ashe pitched in with an enthusiastic nod from Caspar. 

Byleth looked at Felix, who nodded. 

"Let's do it; we brought swords for a reason." Standing up from their spot in the corner of the kitchen, Byleth placed a hand on her hip as she stared down the trio. Felix and Byleth would regret moving, but a spar was always worth it. "We can take these wimps on."

"Hey!" Caspar protested, Ashe, laughing behind him. "You're gonna regret that in about five minutes." 

The group made their way out of the house with excited grins on the face, Caspar raising his sword to part the people in the hallway. Byleth noticed Lorenz speaking with an enthusiastic Hilda and a comfortable-looking Ingrid and Dimitri in the corner of the living room enjoying their time. She caught a glimpse of Hapi and Sylvain already otherwise occupied as she passed the staircase, rolling her eyes. They just couldn't keep their hands off of each other. 

"What in the world are you doing?" Claude asked as they walked by, and Byleth shrugged. 

"Gotta duel." 

"With your boyfriend—" 

Thankfully, Felix was already in front of her heading out the door when Claude said the words; otherwise, she might have evaporated in thin air. 

What the hell was up with everyone bothering her about their relationship status? 

"Could you all quit it?" Byleth huffed, pointing her sword at her friend. 

He raised his hands in the air with a small smirk. "Just asking." 

"Don't." She narrowed her eyes at him, walking out the door. She felt Claude trailing behind her as she walked down the steps to where Felix was waiting with Caspar and Ashe, Linhardt already sitting on the steps with an unenthusiastic look. 

"Are we keeping score?" She heard Claude ask Linhardt as he sat beside the sleepy figure. 

"If we have to." 

The next half hour or so was filled with a debate of rules and regulations regarding their wildly fake spar with friends, though Byleth loved every minute of it. Caspar was adamant that they would fight until the other person was on the ground, but Felix made a good point of not wanting to get run over by a car even if they were on a relatively empty street. Ashe insisted on a fatal hit rule where if they managed to get someone where it would kill them, they automatically lose. 

For Byleth, that was enough. 

She'd already faked Felix out earlier; how difficult would it be to do the same with Caspar and Ashe? 

By the time they were ready to fight, Linhardt was asleep with his head in Claude's lap. 

"Are you finally ready?" Claude asked, and Byleth noticed the smaller crowd behind him. Hilda and Marianne had joined, sitting a few steps up. The blue-haired girl dressed as a fairy was getting her long waves braided by Hilda, who was the living image of the Goddess Aphrodite herself. Near the top of the stairs, Ingrid and Dimitri had removed themselves from the corner of the living room.

"We're ready," Byleth waved. 

"Go Lions!" Ingrid shouted, and Byleth saw Felix roll his eyes, though she didn't miss the hint of a smile that threatened to show. 

"Eagle Pride!" Caspar shouted back with a smack on his chest before he got into position. The salute earned a small _woo_ from Edelgard, who now joined the others on the steps. 

And then, they were off. 

The spar honestly didn't even last that long.

Caspar got too cocky with her and left his middle wide open when he went in for a swing. She managed to slice him right across the stomach, and though he protested, Byleth had a sure win. Easy laughter escaped her lips as Caspar pouted off to go sit with Linhardt. She found herself stepping back to give Felix and Ashe some room, but the two were holding their own against each other. 

Byleth admired the look Felix got in his amber eyes when he set his focus on something. He was unshakable, completely focused, and the intensity of his gaze turned electric. Felix didn't spare this intensity for anything, as far as she could tell, not even for their toothpick spars, and definitely not against this spar with Ashe. 

It wasn't long before Felix got the upper hand, and Ashe was down as well. He tried to spin away to get more space between them for a broader blow, but Felix snuck in and hit him in the back. Had they been on a real battlefield, Ashe was sure to be done for. 

Byleth found herself cheering as Felix turned around with a proud look on his face. She could hear the small wave of cheers from their friends on the stairs as they looked back. It had been sort of comical seeing everyone in their costumes cheering them on with their fake spar. Ashe held up pretty well for being defeated, but he still held his hand out for a friendly handshake. 

"Good match, we'll have to do that again someday." He said with a smile before running off to join the others. 

"I'll hold you to it," Byleth called after him, finding herself smiling just the same. 

But when she turned around, instead of finding a happy Felix as she thought, she found him in the ready position for another spar, looking at her with that electric stare she liked so much. His eyes were set on her this time, and she was more than happy to be in his orbit.

"I told you we weren't done yet." 

Remembering the words he said earlier sent a static thrill up her spine. 

Felix did say that. 

Byleth heard Claude whistle from the staircase as she began to walk forward, getting into the ready position herself. She wasn't about to lose to Felix if she had anything to say about it. 

As they circled each other on the gravel street, Byleth saw the mischievous glint in his amber eyes as he made the first move. A quick move meant to try to get her to react, but she stayed in place. 

He wasn't going to get her that easily. 

And she couldn't help the grin that began to spread on her face, much the same as his as they began to finally clash swords. 

The sound of the plastic hitting each other was still as pathetic of a thwack as before, but their eyes were glued to each other, watching each other's movements with subtle glances. Every part of her felt electric with the adrenaline of wanting the win, feeling the burn of her arms as she imagined their swords clashing with steel instead. 

From the genuine smile on his face, Byleth knew Felix was doing just the same. 

And she was so hopelessly enamoured with him. 

Byleth slammed Felix's plastic sword with hers, unaware that she was pushing him back into the lip of the sidewalk before both of them were tumbling to the ground. 

Felix hit the concrete first with an audible grunt, and she used her hands to try to break her fall. Her knees came in contact with the hard concrete on either side of Felix, feeling like she was crushing him with her weight. She could hardly feel the sting on her hands and knees from the impact because his wide amber eyes were so close to hers as she realized their position. 

Felix's face was near enough, she could feel his ragged breath on her cheeks as her green eyes darted between his. Byleth felt paralyzed to move. She watched as his gaze dropped to her lips and lingered. If her heart could speed up more, it definitely did. All she had to do was lean in, and they would— 

His eyes lifted from looking at her lips, their closeness finally registering as she felt him shift beneath her. Felix placed his hands above her scraped knees, brows furrowing with concern. She was silently cursing her scraped knees because if they hadn't distracted him, they would've already— 

"Byleth?" He asked, his eyes darting down to her lips again. 

Should she just—? 

"I think Byleth won!" Claude shouted, shifting their attention to his grinning face. 

Byleth could feel her cheeks heating up as she realized others were watching them. 

Fuck. 

Scrambling from her place, she sat back to get her feet on the ground, pushing herself up as fast as she could. Her hand extended to Felix, who looked similarly as flushed, taking it without making eye contact. 

Fuck, fuck, _fuck._

Byleth watched as his hand went to the back of his head, and she immediately felt terrible. 

"Is your head okay?" 

"It's fine," Felix shrugged it off, continuing to refuse eye contact. His stare was glued to the concrete as she brushed off her skirt. Her tights were ripped now, but she couldn't care less. The way her heart was pounding was a more pressing matter. "Your sword is bent to shit." Felix pointed out. 

A defeated sigh left her lips as she looked at the bent plastic sword, looking pitiful on the sidewalk where they'd crushed it. 

"Eesh, that was quite the fall," Claude said as he waltzed up to them.

"My sword is broken," Byleth mumbled, holding up the sad looking weapon. 

"Mine's kind of broken, too," Where Byleth's sword was full-on bent in the middle, Felix's had a curve now. Cheap blades, good for nothing. She was mildly upset that they didn't last the entire night, but she supposed it was unavoidable when they were so rough. 

And when you fell on top of each other.

Goddess damn it, she couldn't believe that happened. 

"I can go get you some duct tape if you think that'd help?" Claude offered, looking less than enthused. 

"Yes, that would be really helpful, actually," Byleth nodded, taking him up on the offer. Claude's face fell at the request, letting out an exasperated sigh before he turned toward the house. 

"If I find duct tape in Lorenz Hellman Gloucester's house, you owe me a round of drinks next time we go out," He yelled back as he began stalking off to the staircase. Byleth couldn't help but laugh at the statement, wholeheartedly agreeing. 

"You got it!"

She watched Claude run off until he disappeared into the house, trying to find the strength to look back at Felix. The energy was strange between them now, at least on her side. Was he bothered that she'd invaded his space like that?

"While he grabs the tape, I'm getting a drink," Felix finally spoke up, still rubbing the back of his head. "Do you want anything?" 

"Whatever you're having." 

He nodded before they walked to the staircase with their pathetic swords, her heart still hammering in her chest. Byleth watched him disappear into the house as she took a seat on the concrete stairs, letting out a long sigh. 

What in the hell was she doing?

She was more graceful than that. 

Resting the broken sword on her knees, she leaned her head in her hands with her eyes closed as she tried to process her next move. 

He really looked at her lips. And he looked like he wanted her to lean in. 

If everyone else wasn't around, she _would_ have. 

Byleth rubbed her face with her hands, willing the redness that heated her cheeks to go away. It was an unusual reaction from her, and she didn't like it. The push and pull of it all, the unknowing, and the guessing were too frustrating. It was the exact reason she didn't deal with it initially, but there she was. 

And, oh, she wanted to give in and say something. 

But it wasn't right yet. 

Felix pulled her out of her thoughts as he sat next to her on the steps, holding out a red cup filled with liquid courage. Exactly what she needed. 

"Thanks," She took a large swig of the contents before her face contorted at the burn of liquid going down her throat. Silently thankful her father taught her to hold her liquor, Byleth fought the urge to cough. "What the _hell_ did you put in here?" It was awful. 

"I just grabbed what I could," Felix admitted with a shrug, and she noticed how close he was sitting. His shoulder rubbed against hers as she realized their hips were touching. Taking a sweeping look at the staircase, there was no reason for him to be sitting so close, but she wasn't about to complain. 

Gathering the courage to look over, Byleth cast him a sideways glance to see that his face was still flushed. Great. They were on the same page, at least. 

"You're lucky!" Claude exclaimed as he appeared behind them, holding out a roll of silver duct tape between their heads. Byleth looked up with wide eyes, actually impressed with the fact he could find such a thing in Lorenz's house. 

"Alright, round on me next time we go out," Byleth laughed, grabbing the roll of tape from his hands. She placed the cup of mixed alcohol beside her as she quickly got to work on the broken sword. 

It helped to focus on something other than the fact Felix was sitting so close to her. _And_ the fact she'd just fallen on top of him in front of everyone. But having something to do with her hands made it easier to think when both his eyes and Claude's were on her. She tuned out their banter as she wrapped the silver tape around the sword, securing it as tightly as possible to help out the bend. It seemed to be working, much to her delight. Soon, there would be no evidence of their major fuck up.

"Do you think this is enough?" Byleth asked, giving the reinforced sword a firm grip to test its strength. It seemed sturdier than before, thanks to the layers of tape she'd put on., but who knew how long it would hold with how hard she and Felix were going at it. 

_If_ they were to continue after what just happened.

"I don't know, try it out," Felix suggested. 

Turning to face Felix, Byleth took a good swing and hit him on the arm with a surprising thwack. 

"Ow," Felix rubbed his arm but looked highly impressed with the new and improved weapon. "Yeah, that's much better." 

Claude rubbed his temples, shaking his head at the two. 

"Wanna try it?" Raising the sword to their friend, Byleth proudly held out her prized possession. Sure, it didn't look great anymore. It just looked like a stick of duct tape. But it _worked._

"Nah, I'm more of a bow and arrow kinda guy." He waved, standing up from the stone staircase with a grin. "You two go ahead. Congrats on the win, Byleth!" 

"You're missing out, Riegan!" Byleth called as he left, letting out a disappointed sigh. "How could anyone walk away from this masterpiece?" 

Felix shrugged his shoulders half-heartedly and held out his hand. "Give me the tape, my turn." 

His work was a bit hastier than hers, now that they knew what they were doing. Byleth had to focus not to shiver every time his arm rubbed against hers as he wrapped the fake blade, reminding her of their proximity. She felt her heart beginning to slow, at least, mostly thanks to the alcohol. Reaching behind to grab her drink, Byleth brought the cup to her lips just as their pair of redheaded friends stumbled down the stairs. 

Thank the Goddess they'd missed their earlier debacle; otherwise, they'd never hear the end of it.

They looked positively smitten with each other, which only meant one thing: they were leaving, and Byleth and Felix would be stuck together for the night. 

Not that she minded. 

It was a regular occurrence. 

The couple stood on the sidewalk, hands roaming each other's torsos as their lips were locked. Byleth assumed they'd already called a cab to come pick them up. But where were they going? She _really_ didn't feel like walking in on Sylvain's naked ass again, and she was almost positive Felix didn't either. They'd spent enough time retreating to Bean's, though, she didn't mind that. Chatting or sitting in comfortable silence with Felix in the coffee shop wasn't the worst thing ever, but for Goddess's sake, she didn't want to see Sylvain's _parts_ if she didn't have to.

Standing up from her spot, Byleth ran down the few steps, catching Felix's attention now. Using her newly reinforced sword, she smacked Sylvain on the ass with the flat part of the blade. 

"Hey," Byleth called out, furrowing her brows as she watched the two pull apart and stare at her like she was some sort of villain in their story. 

"Hey!" Sylvain complained, and she heard Felix snort behind her.

Byleth narrowed her eyes at her best friend, who stood there and shrugged.

"What?" Hapi seemed unfazed, waiting for Byleth to get on with it.

"Where are you going?" 

"My place," Sylvain stated with a playful smirk. 

Felix got up, standing next to her with a scowl on his face. They always ended up going to Felix and Sylvain's place because it was bigger, but that didn't work out when said friends were so handsy all the time. Neither of them wanted to be in the vicinity of that.

"Text me when it's safe," Felix muttered. 

“Will do.” Sylvain winked. 

Byleth couldn't help but roll her eyes. 

"How's the date going?" Hapi asked with a glint in her eye. She knew what she was doing, evil woman. 

Byleth didn't have time to think of a good rebuttal before the car was pulling up to the curb, ready for Sylvain and Hapi to jump in. Although Byleth wasn't mad about it, she was annoyed they got the nice apartment.

Sylvain waved with a small chuckle, tugging at his girlfriend's hand. 

Hapi left behind him with a lazy peace sign. "Don't kill each other!" 

When Byleth turned to Felix after the car sped off, he shrugged, rolling his amber eyes. 

"When are they going to get their own place?" 

Good, they were just going to ignore the date comment.

"I don't know, but I'm ready for it." She mumbled, taking a sip of her drink. The moon coming up through the clouds caught her eye, casting a yellow glow as it rose between the tall buildings in the distance. "You can come over to my place." Byleth offered with a shrug.

"It's fine—" 

"You've never been over in the what— year we've known each other? Come over," She shook her head with an encouraging smile. "It's a safer hideout than sitting in your lobby or in Bean's until we pass out…" 

Felix looked contemplative for a moment, and she wondered if she went too far. Why would suggesting he come over for the night be too far? She couldn't place it. Mostly, she hoped she wasn't overstepping some sort of boundary—more of a boundary than falling on top of him crossed.

"Are you sure?" 

"Yeah," Byleth shrugged again. "It's not that far away." 

"Do we have to stay since they're gone…?" Felix asked, looking back at the house where the party was still going. The laughter that spilled into the streets made her happy, but Byleth found herself itching for some silence as well.

Maybe she could say something if they got far enough away from the house. 

Or once they got to her apartment. 

"No, we can go." Byleth nodded towards the direction of the subway station with the hint of a smile. She slowly began to lead Felix down the sidewalk. "I've had enough Halloween excitement, I think." 

"Was it everything you thought it'd be?" 

She had to think about it for a moment. 

Of course, adult Halloween parties were different than the version she'd heard of as a kid. The whole dressing up as an adult thing, she never quite grasped either, but, all in all… 

"It was better." She replied honestly with a small nod. 

Felix's brows raised slightly at the admission, and she had to smile. 

"Was it as awful as it's always been for you?" 

"No." He mumbled, speeding up his pace to walk past her. Her curiosity wanted to ask what he meant by that and to elaborate, but she held back. If he wanted to tell her more, he would. "I usually end up getting left with everyone else because Dimitri and Ingrid go off, and Sylvain ends up running off with some random girl. It's never fun." He paused, giving her a sideways glance. "This was… not so bad." 

"Because?" 

He shrugged.

"I don't hate spending time with you." 

Byleth's eyes widened, finding herself biting her lip to suppress the smile that threatened to grow. What the hell was she getting so happy about? That was nothing to get so excited over. But her heart was speeding up, and she wanted to lean into him. To do something. 

Because Felix didn't just offer compliments like that. 

"You're not so bad yourself." She replied, giving him a quick look. Was that the hint of a blush? Couldn't be. 

"Give me your sword," He mumbled, changing the subject. 

Had she embarrassed him? 

Holding out the plastic weapon, Felix moved his coat to shove the blades on his right hip, between through the teal scarf like a holster. It seemed to work well enough, the swords crossing as if they were meant to be carried together, anyway.

The closer they got to the station, the more Byleth found herself relaxing into being alone with Felix again. A cool breeze blew down the street, sending the few leaves that still clung to the sparse trees rattling and flying to the ground. The buzz of the night was still clearly in the air by all of the excited chatter of the people they passed, costumed and laughing about their nights so far. 

The number of people began to get denser as they climbed down the stairs into the station, and Byleth found herself nearly getting lost from Felix in the mess of it all. There was a person dressed as a carton of milk with a box around their body that nearly poked her eye out, and another who was dressed as some sort of tree being wearing stilts that almost trampled her. 

Losing an eye to a milk carton costume was precisely the way she wanted to end her night. 

Byleth could hear Felix scowling behind her as he tried to keep up with the madness. It wouldn't have been much help for them to get separated when he hardly knew where she lived. 

So, she held out her hand. 

And he took it. 

But instead of just holding it like someone usually would have, Felix, laced his fingers with hers, tightly gripping her palm to his as they began to weave through the crowds waiting for their trains. Through another set of stairs, he didn't let go, and she wasn't about to either. 

As she looked back, he offered a small squeeze. She willed her heart to stop beating so hard for the thousandth time that night. 

Thankfully, her stop involved a train with fewer people. As they descended to the station for her train, she noticed only a few girls chatting about their night on the far side and a man sleeping on a bench on the other. That left Felix and Byleth with ample time to speak. 

She was disappointed when he dropped her hand. 

"How far away is your apartment exactly?" He asked. 

"Four or five stops." She shrugged. "We can watch a movie or something when we get there? That's what my dad and I used to do for Halloweens." 

"Oh?" 

She nodded. "Bad horror, usually. Never phased me, and he laughed the entire time." 

"Sounds alright to me." 

"Do you like horror?" 

"I don't really have a preference as long as the acting isn't god awful." 

"But that's the fun of it. It's always awful." 

Felix paused as if he was mulling something around in his mind. Deciding if it was going to be worth it. "Alright." 

"You don't believe me?" 

"As long as you don't mind me complaining the whole time." 

"That's the best part. We just shit talk the whole thing." 

Felix huffed out a laugh, shaking his head slightly. "Alright. If your tradition dictates a bad horror movie on Halloween, it's only right." 

She couldn't help but smile at that. 

"Don't expect me to get scared, though." 

"Don't worry, I'll be there to hold your hand if you do." She teased, shoving his shoulder lightly. 

His mouth opened, blinking as he tried to process her words. "More like the other way around."

"We'll see about that." Byleth quirked her brow as her wrist brushed against his. He held eye contact with her for a moment in a searing gaze, and she noticed how much she enjoyed looking at those amber pools again. She wished she could get closer. 

It almost looked like he was going to until he stepped away.

"If Sylvain forgets to text me, I'm going to kill him," Felix mumbled, leaning against the steel beam on the platform. He carded his fingers through his bangs, looking annoyed about the whole situation. Byleth couldn't really blame him. They'd been subjected to being locked out enough, but at least this time would be different.

She also wasn't about to let him walk and take the subway back home at dawn. 

"We have a couch you can sleep on." She offered, giving him a sideways glance. The corners of his mouth quirked up at the suggestion before his expression turned into more of a scowl.

"As long as Sylvain's never been on it." 

"That, I can't promise." Her own face contorted at the thought, shaking her head. No, she wouldn't subject him to that if he didn't want to. 

"How comfortable is the floor?" Felix asked with an eye roll. 

"I can't promise that he hasn't been there either," Byleth huffed out a laugh at the question, but she quickly found herself biting her lip in thought. Those looks and those touches throughout the night weren't nothing, were they? The way he stared so intently into her eyes when she'd fallen on him during their fake spar spoke volumes to her, but did they mean the same thing to him? He looked at her lips like he wanted to put his hand on the back of her head and pull her in. 

Was she going to do it? 

"Or, you could just sleep in my bed. Sylvain definitely hasn't been there." 

Felix's mouth opened slightly, processing what she'd just said.

"Where are you going to sleep?"

"I'll sleep on the couch," She shrugged, watching his brows furrow slightly. Any concentration she thought she had was gone as she saw his tongue dart out and wet his lips. 

"No, you won't."

Felix closed the space between them considerably by taking her hand, pulling her in. He slipped his hand up hers, capturing Byleth's wrist in a hold to pull her even closer to where he stood against the steel beam. Felix's eyes were locked on hers in an intense gaze, flitting only momentarily to her lips for the third time that night. 

It was all the confirmation that she needed to make a move. 

Pinning him to the steel beam with her body, Byleth tugged on the lapel of his black jacket to pull his face down to her. His palm held the back of her head as his lips finally pressed into hers. The rest of the people around them completely disappeared, the chatter turning into a distant hum as she became flooded in him. The kiss was every bit as intense as she imagined it'd be, full of teeth because of their eagerness until they found their rhythm. And when they did, it was so, so good.

The screech of the metal as the train finally came to the station didn't bother them at all. The wind blew their hair in every direction as it came to a stop, even with Felix's hand tangled in her mint strands and black extensions. They would be a major bitch to get out later if they were knotted.

Byleth couldn't care less.

They really had to get on. 

She didn't want to, though; she wanted to keep kissing him. 

Unfortunately, Felix pulled away, but not before taking her bottom lip between his teeth and gently tugging. It took everything in her to suppress the sound that threatened to come out of her. Goddess damn them for being in public. Felix grabbed her hand with the smallest smirk and began pulling her towards the subway's open doors. 

They sat next to each other on the busy train, not meeting each other's eyes. Their shoulders and hips touched, sending an electric current through Byleth's body as she tried to ignore the urge to run her hand down his arm. 

Were they really taking it to the next level now? 

Felix didn't seem like the one-night-stand type, and she wasn't really sure that's what she wanted with him at all. 

No, for the first time, she felt herself wanting something more from this, which was terrifying. 

But with Felix, it felt less like a free fall and more like gravity just waiting to take over. They were both inexplicably drawn to each other, and they were slowly pulled with an intense force. She couldn't ignore it anymore. 

And she wanted to give it a chance. 

As the subway doors opened at her stop, Byleth stood and didn't look back to see if he was following. She knew Felix was from the feeling of his arm against hers, their hands brushing as they quickly made their way through the turnstiles and up the stairs. The crisp chill of the autumn night sent a small shiver down her spine as they reached the top, turning to lock eyes with Felix once again. 

He had the same look she did, full of question and curiosity, both of them wanting answers but neither of them speaking up to get them. 

Did they really need to speak, though?

They never were ones for words. 

Every part of Byleth wanted to shove Felix against the brick wall of the building next to them, but that would be stupid. They were only a block away from her apartment. They could manage. 

"Which way?" Felix asked, and she found herself smiling. 

Byleth took his hand in hers, intertwining their fingers as she began to lead him to her apartment. She had to pace herself to prevent running up the stairs of her building, opening every door with slight annoyance. 

They were just barriers keeping her from what she wanted now. 

As she quickly pulled him down the hall to her door and slipped her key out of the too-small pocket of her skirt, Felix wrapped an arm around her waist. He moved her hair out of the way to press small kisses behind her ear as she struggled to insert the key and unlock the door. It was too distracting. 

And from the smirk she felt on her skin, he knew exactly what he was doing. 

Finally, she got it unlocked, turning the handle to stumble into the apartment as fast as possible. The second she closed the door, Byleth found herself pinned, her hand above her head as he pressed himself against her.

"How long?" Felix asked, searching her green eyes.

She actually had to think about it. 

Had it been weeks? 

Months? 

It had to be months.

Could it have been the whole year? 

"Long enough." She answered, gripping the back of his neck to pull his lips to hers in a searing kiss. She wasted no time now, nipping at his bottom lip to get access, savouring the taste of him. His free hand roamed up from her hip to her ribs, stroking the skin there with his thumb. It was enough to elicit a small whine from her, gripping onto his neck as she tried to ground herself. 

Usually, she wasn't this easy. 

She needed to calm down. 

But when he pulled away to look at her curiously with those molten amber eyes, she couldn't help but feel weak in the knees. 

"Do you…?" He asked, and she nodded. She wanted his hands all over her immediately. "Words, Byleth." 

"Yes." She sighed, her hands flying up to cup his cheeks as she dove in for another kiss. 

Byleth ran her cold hand down his exposed chest, urging him to walk back towards the living room couch. The shiver she felt him suppress made her smile against his lips as she dragged her hand down further, popping open the flimsy buttons. 

Usually, she didn't like to keep these things in the open space, living with a roommate and all. But she really couldn't be bothered to drag Felix all the way down the hall. 

They wouldn't make it. 

They'd end up on the floor of the hallway at the speed they were going, and Byleth wanted to be more comfortable. 

So, she pushed him back on the low couch with a sly grin, watching his wide charcoal lined eyes as she climbed on top of him. 

"How do you get this off?" Felix asked, running his fingers up the front of the lacing. 

"You untie it." 

"Where are your scissors?" 

"Felix," Byleth complained. "This was expensive." 

"What about this?" Felix tugged at the tie of her skirt, which was a whole other issue. 

She thought about it for a moment. 

"Rip it." 

Finding the seam in the fabric, Felix didn't even hesitate to tear the threads apart enough to pull the skirt up off Byleth's head. The thing was utterly trashed now, but she could hardly care. That was indescribably hot.

Byleth dove into another kiss, her hands clawing at the jacket that was still covering his shoulders. Felix sat up briefly to shrug the jacket off, shifting her position enough to feel his arousal through the fabric barrier. 

Fuck. He was already so hard.

Byleth couldn't help but grind into it with her hips, using his shoulders as leverage as his warm hands gripped at her sides. She began to press kisses into the corner of his mouth, dragging across his jaw and to his neck, where she started to suck at the sensitive skin. The small groan he let out as she rolled her hips against his sent a shock of pleasure through her whole body, only hoping she could hear it again. 

Only Felix had different ideas. 

"Stand up," Felix demanded as he pulled away, a fire in his amber eyes.

Byleth listened and shifted her position to stand in front of him. His hands ran down her hips to her thighs, rubbing his thumbs into her skin. She couldn't help but admire the marks of lipstick she'd already smattered all over his jaw as he hooked his fingers in the waistband of her tights, looking up at her for permission. 

With a nod, Byleth watched as he pulled the tights down her legs, feeling the cold chill of the air hit her skin as she stood half bare. Felix kept his eyes on hers as his hands slid back up her legs, his touch on her exposed thighs as he kneaded his thumbs into her muscles, only increasing the heat pooling in her centre. 

She had to get the rest of her damn clothes off. Byleth's hands flew to her back to remove the clasps of the corset still pinched around her waist, tossing the fake leather aside. 

"That's a cruel trick," Felix mumbled at the fabric.

The white blouse was up over her head as the chill of the air hit her chest, watching Felix's eyes grow wide with want. 

"Now you know for next time." 

She hardly even realized the words that had tumbled off her lips because his mouth was on her hip bone before she could think straight. Felix pressed a hot trail of biting kisses down her thigh, pulling back to look up at her with another question in his eyes. Except for this time, he used his words. 

"Can I touch you?"

A short breath left her lips as she nodded in anticipation. The small smirk that graced Felix's features could've made her knees buckle right then and there, but Byleth didn't have the chance before his warm fingers were pressed into her folds. Immediately, one of her hands flew to his head, her fingers tangling in his dark hair as the other used his shoulder to keep herself upright. 

Felix continued to leave dangerous kisses between her hips as his thumb began to rub glorious circles into her clit. She couldn't help the quiet moan that escaped her parted lips, cursing herself for being so easy when he'd barely even started touching her. But it felt so _good._

Why weren't they doing this before? 

She didn't know what she was expecting from him, but it wasn't this. 

"Sit down," Felix insisted, the sudden loss of his fingers on her eliciting another whine from Byleth. He guided her to the other side of the couch, where she slouched into the cushions with her brows furrowed. An elfin sigh left Byleth's lips as she watched him studying her, only frustrating her more. But when he slid to the floor on his knees, shifting his position, she instantly wasn't so disappointed. 

Byleth watched as he parted her knees, lifting one leg up over his shoulder to give him the best access. He began leaving biting kisses from her knee up to her thigh, slowly drawing out each one until his lips met just above where she wanted them to be. She couldn't help the hand that grabbed the back of his head, tangling into the strands of hair that had fallen out during their night as he began to lick her clit. The sigh that left her lips soon turned into a full out moan as she gripped his hair tighter, drawing out his own. 

"Felix," She sighed again, her heart speeding up as he reached out and laced his fingers with hers. It was so different than what she was used to, going into things without feeling, that the gesture was nearly enough to send her over already. Byleth had a rule with all of the others that they weren't supposed to be too affectionate. Too intimate. It was just for the feeling. But this was so different.

She just wanted more, and Felix provided until it was her turn to show him some care.

The rest of the night went by in a blissful blur, one she wouldn't forget. It was easy to look past the ridiculousness of their costumes from Halloween night when they felt so lost in each other. Every touch from him felt like a jolt of electricity on her skin, every movement like he knew her body already, and if he didn't, he did everything he could to learn better. It was the most attentive anyone had ever been before, and she was wholly enamoured in it. All she wanted to do was figure him out better and have another chance. 

It was paralyzing and thrilling all at the same time. 

A warm haze enveloped Byleth as she began to wake from sleep, savouring the quiet comfort she didn't often get to indulge in. Usually, alarms were waking her up, alerting her to hurry up to get going for the day. The never-ending hustle of school had her working her ass off every minute she could to make being in this costly city worth it, and she'd be damned if she didn't make the most of it.

But right now, it was just the bliss of the fabric of the couch, a thin blanket barely keeping her covered and a warm body pressed against hers.

Wait. 

Byleth tensed up as the realization struck her, eyes opening slowly as she looked down at the arms that enveloped her waist. 

She wasn't shy.

Why did she feel so reluctant to turn around?

Instead, she opted to take it steady, lightly running her fingertips down his forearm until they circled his wrist. Felix made it known that he was awake by holding her tighter and pressing his face into her shoulder. It was funny how such a simple action could get her heart racing like it would beat out of her chest. Being so tangled up with someone.

Not just someone, but with Felix. 

She really liked Felix.

Everything felt comfortable with him in a way it hadn't with so many others.

The way the night ended— Yeah, that was incredible. Full-body shivers good. There was no beating around the bush about that. 

But even before the night ended, his willingness to participate in the extravagant holiday was sweet because she'd never done it before. And the way they spent their time together at the party, using their stupid swords and competing like they always did, was fun. Sure, everyone else was around, but they were perfectly content doing their own thing as they usually did, anyway. 

It had become a habit recently, quietly observing their rowdy friends or doing something else together. Usually, something else involved them going head to head in some kind of stupid competition they made up on the spot, but nevertheless, it was a part of their friendship she found herself looking forward to. 

Byleth wanted Felix to know her, which was an entirely new feeling in itself. She felt gravity pulling her into his orbit every time they were near each other. And when they weren't, she missed it. 

It was sort of… terrifying. 

And now, part of her instinct was telling her to propel herself away as quickly as possible and pretend she didn't fuck up by letting him stay with her all night. 

But for the first time in her life, she kind of just wanted to pull him closer. 

Gravity was winning. 

Releasing his wrist, Byleth slid her hand up to tangle her fingers with his. She brought their hands up to her chest, resting the back of his hand against her sternum. 

"Your heart is beating so fast," Felix mumbled into her shoulder with a raspy morning voice.

Fuck.

She'd never made it to the morning with anyone, but now she understood what people meant by the appeal of having a different voice when they woke up. And she needed to hear more of it. 

Inhaling deeply, she turned to face him and promptly gasped, covering her mouth.

They'd both completely forgot about their ridiculous make-up from the night before. 

The charcoal eyeliner was now smudged all around Felix's bright amber eyes matched with stains of her berry lipstick on his… everywhere. 

Byleth could only imagine she looked similar.

"You look—" 

"Yeah, so do you." She choked out, laughing now. 

The realization hit Felix like a train as he took a sharp breath. 

"Fuck," He cursed, rubbing his eye and smearing the remnants of the make-up even further. 

"Don't— Oh, Goddess, just stop," Byleth said, grabbing at his hand. 

"What the hell did Dorothea do?" Staring at his hand, now covered in black streaks, Felix furrowed his brows in frustration. 

"She must have used the smudging kind of eyeliner because I know the shit she uses doesn't budge." 

The theatre princess had pristine make-up; whether she was crying tears of pain or laughter, it only made sense that she had several tricks up her sleeve. Apparently, she'd chosen to give them a rugged look and spare them the dignity of looking beautiful the whole time.

"She's going to pay for this." 

"Hey, at least we looked good last night…" Byleth mumbled as she began to rub at a patch of red left on his jaw and saw his eyes narrow. 

"How the hell did it get down there?" 

"That's my fault. Lipstick."

"Oh." He blinked, a pink flush appearing on his cheeks. 

It was kind of cute that they could do what they did last night, and he would still blush at the mere mention of lipstick left on his skin.

Byleth's green eyes lifted to meet his for a fleeting second before she pressed a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth. When she'd imagined staying with someone, this wasn't exactly what she'd pictured, but she would take it over anything. Even with smudged eyeliner and lipstick smattering his jaw, Felix sure was pleasant to wake up to.

The handle to the front door started jiggling violently, and Byleth scrambled to sit up, glaring harshly at her roommate, who stood in the doorway.

"By—" Felix sat up, throwing an arm around her to cover her exposed chest. Byleth didn't seem to care at all as she stared down their smirking friend. 

"Oh, sweet stars above, finally. And you actually let Spiky stay the night with you; good job, Chatterbox."

"Hapi—" Byleth started, getting cut off by the sound of more footsteps coming down the hallway. Was the whole damn neighbourhood coming to check in on them, or what?

"Hey, Copper, get a look at this," Hapi nodded to Sylvain in the hallway, who soon came into view. His brown eyes widened before he began to laugh, holding onto the door frame to keep himself upright. 

"Woah-kay was not expecting that this morning," Sylvain managed to get out through bouts of laughter. "Nice make-up, guys. Bedaubed to the Goddess." 

"Shut the fuck up," Felix knocked his forehead against her shoulder, clearly mortified by the entire ordeal.

"Why the hell are you here?" Byleth questioned, glaring at both of them now. 

"Well, neither of you would answer your phones. We had to make sure you didn't murder each other with plastic swords in the streets of Fhirdiad or something," Hapi waved her hand and walked into the kitchen, throwing her purse on the counter. She could care less that the two were completely naked under a thin blanket.

"We thought we'd come over and ask if you wanted to get breakfast, but… maybe you have other plans." The taller redhead commented as he followed Hapi to the kitchen, shooting an obvious wink their way.

"Sylvain," Felix warned.

"They're probably dead, I don't know." Byleth looked around the room at their strewn out clothes, scanning the table for either of their phones. Of course, they were nowhere to be found; otherwise, they would have heard them. "I want breakfast, but you have to get out because I'm not putting that stupid costume back on, and Felix ripped my skirt—"

"Byleth—"

"Dude," Sylvain doubled over on the kitchen counter, laughing again. "You did what?" 

"She told me to." 

"Was this in the middle of the pirate role-play, or what?" The taller redhead teased, raising a curious brow at the two. He raised the pitch of his voice to a whine, dramatically shouting, " _Yes, Captain—_ "

"Syl _vain_ ," Felix said through gritted teeth. 

"At least he got me off more than once—" Byleth interjected. 

" _Byleth._ " He gripped her tighter now, his warm skin against her back sending a shiver up her spine, and she could only shrug. 

"Hey, that was one time, and we were completely wasted. Hapi, what do you tell her?" 

_"Alright, alright, come on, Copper. Let's give them some space to get dressed; I'm starving." Hapi interrupted the three with an amused smile on her lips._

~

The picture of that Halloween night, with all of their friends not so neatly piled onto the brownstone staircase in costumes, still hung on the corkboard. She couldn't remember who took it because she was too busy clashing swords with Felix instead of paying attention to whoever took the photo. 

After that night, their relationship continued to bloom in what others might have considered an unconventional way. They took their time, which Byleth was thankful for. Though they weren't able to hide it from Sylvain and Hapi, they were able to lock down their best friends into secrecy until they were comfortable. It required a lot of shuffling from one apartment to another, not wanting to invade the other couple's space, but they made it work.

Of course, the rest of their friends just rolled their eyes or shouted _finally_ once they found out. 

As if they had any clue. 

It felt like so long ago, now. 

Prying her eyes away from the photo, Byleth wondered if Felix had ever thought about taking them down. Most of the pictures featuring the two of them also included their friends, which was probably a reason to keep them up. But the thought crossed her mind. Was it as jarring for him as it was for her to see their memories together staring back at them with so much life?

Byleth had purged most of her items or packed them away in boxes she hadn't opened yet. Everything from Fhirdiad almost felt painful to open in Derdriu, and she wasn't sure when she would get around to it. It felt like a good idea to just start fresh, but the memories in those boxes were still so important, and it went against everything she'd ever known the majority of her life. 

To have something to miss and to reminisce about that she wanted to go back to was different.

But she _didn't_ want to come back. Derdriu was great. Her job was excellent. 

Everything was fine. 

Her elbows slid across the granite counter as her head came down to rest on the cool surface, willing the feelings to go away. Idly drawing figure eights onto the smooth texture, a frustrated sigh left her body. She had to snap out of it before Felix came back; otherwise, he'd be bothering her about why she was looking so somber, though it should've been obvious. 

Byleth didn't want to talk about that night or the fact she couldn't open her boxes. 

Felix didn't need to know she couldn't open her boxes. 

Closing her green eyes, she let the cool granite take over her thoughts, focusing on the soothing coolness instead of the problems she could deal with later. Now, all she had to do was get to sleep relatively soon, and it would all be over in the morning. And listen to Felix's voice as it carried from the other room with that tone that said he was more than annoyed at whoever had called. Curiosity flooded Byleth's mind as she began to wonder what the person bothering him wanted. She was almost sure he'd come back and tell her, but her stomach dropped at the sense of normalcy of it all. 

He'd come back in the kitchen and tell her about work. 

They would talk about what they should eat. 

Felix would probably put some music on, and they'd let the comfortable silence of the atmosphere take over until their food arrived. 

Who knew what the rest of the night would bring.

Byleth sighed hard, standing back upright to shake the thoughts from her head. She had to get her shit together to deal with the next few hours until she could sleep. 

Just a couple more hours. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> welp here's a snippet of smut i didn't think would happen. 
> 
> good news is, next chapter is pretty much done so it'll be out in probably a week? maybe two. 
> 
> anyway, i hope y'all enjoy even tho it pains me that it's not up to par with my standards lmfaooo. 
> 
> next chapter is definitely better.
> 
> thank u as always to sayl n mel for the support. y'all yelling at me is v appreciated <3\. lmfao. 
> 
> thank u also to the felileth server for dealing with my cursed ramblings. 
> 
> thanks for sticking with me!


	3. forever is the sweetest con

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth realizes she's been extremely absent from all of her friend's lives in a huge way after talking to Felix, and proximity becomes far too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow hi guys this is my first time doing smut so I hope it’s okay EVEN THOUGH IT’S LIKE… LOTS OF PLOT PLUS SOME SMUT LOL
> 
> I would like to reiterate that this was supposed to be a ONE SHOT? !?? !??
> 
> If you want to skip the intense stuff, stop reading after the flashback! The flashback is between two ~, so once you read that, feel free to mosey on by. 
> 
> For those of you who are continuing on to read the smut, feel free to get a glass of water, get some popcorn, a snack, if u will, bc this sucker is long af, and I’m sorry?? Lmfao
> 
> content warning: oral sex, vaginal sex, biting (it’s felileth), and hair-pulling (it’s felileth).

"Fucking hell," Felix mumbled as he came back into the kitchen, rubbing his neck. The way he tensed his shoulders made Byleth want to rub her thumbs into the muscles of his back just like she had so many times before. She was almost sure that was something she should _not_ do at the moment.

What was worse? The distraction of the memories plaguing her thoughts at every turn or the potential distraction of _him,_ right in front of her. 

"Work?" Byleth braced herself for the coming conversation, wincing at the normalcy she knew would come with it. 

"Yeah. Do you want to get some food?" Felix asked, opening the fridge to scan what she could see were empty shelves. Nothing but water bottles and what looked like various alcoholic drinks. How was Felix surviving lately? "I'd offer something here, but I don't have much… just frozen meat."

Oh, a meatloaf would be just so domestic and lovely, wouldn't it? 

"Still haven't managed to start cooking, hm?" She questioned with a slightly teasing tone.

"I'll have you know I've been just fine," With a sigh, Felix grabbed two bottles and turned back to the granite island. He slid the cool bottle over the smooth surface to her before leaning on the counter, beginning to scroll on his phone. "I haven't had the time to shop. Work has been stupid, as you can see."

The quiet apartment gained a fraction of life again as Felix put on some background noise. Music she wasn't familiar with. The realization that it was a song so unfamiliar, but one she would've enjoyed, cut harder than she would've liked it to. He'd found something new to listen to without her. 

Of course, he had. 

Of course, she did, too. 

For some reason, it didn't make it any less painful to be in his apartment, leaning on his countertop like she'd done a thousand times before as they listened to music, with the knowledge it wasn't something they shared anymore. 

An awful ache began to rise in her chest that she chose to ignore by taking a sip of her drink.

"Why? What big fancy brand is ruining your life now?" 

The question was more of a tease since the agency marketed towards lawyers, banks, and the likes.

"Zoltan." 

"No." Her mouth dropped open with the slight raise of her brows. 

Felix nodded, amber eyes flicking up to meet hers for a second. The ghost of a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. It was a brand everyone was familiar with, an elite sportswear company that took over the world with its flashy advertisements and sleek designs. Byleth knew as well as anyone that both of their closets were full of Zoltan branded pieces for high impact sports training. 

It was a huge deal and a completely different direction for the company. 

"It took a lot of convincing, but we worked it out." 

"Felix Fraldarius saying please for once in his life?" Byleth teased. 

They both knew that wasn't true.

Mind out of the gutter, Byleth.

"It worked." 

Byleth shook her head in slight awe as she watched him. It really was a huge accomplishment, considering the massive plummet the company took a year earlier when Felix's father died. 

It was in the living room behind her where Felix had gotten the call that he'd had a heart attack and was in emergency surgery. 

Those few days they spent in the hospital waiting room felt like a haze in her memory. Half of them were confused for her experiences with her own father only a few years before. She did remember focusing her energy on the outside things that Felix needed to get done so he didn't have to deal with it. Being in the hospital paired with juggling business bullshit no one expected was too much for one person to handle.

She still had dreams about Felix and Dimitri arguing about whether or not to let him go.

It was awful.

Their final year and a half of college was strained by the pressure of eventual role fulfillment upon graduation, and that took a toll on him whether he realized it or not. In his typical Felix way, he'd powered through the entire thing, but not without its difficulties. Initially, he had hopes of continuing his lower position in the company to do other studies on the side and hopefully slip away from the whole family business thing.

That didn't happen when he was thrown into such a high position nearly a week after school was completed. Byleth tried to push him to take more time, even though she was already on her way out, but he didn't want to hear it. Felix needed something to focus on because sitting around wasn't something he was comfortable with. There was already a wedge between them at that point.

Byleth didn't stick around long enough to see how his plans to overhaul their model worked out, but obviously, they were proving successful. Not that she had any doubt. Felix had a brilliant mind, and it shone when he had a goal he was invested in. 

"That's amazing…" Drawing figure eights on the granite counter, she looked up briefly. "How much convincing Dimitri did it take to get that one to happen?"

"Well, first, it started with Sylvain. He was on board pretty quickly once I told him my idea." Felix explained, continuing to scroll through menus on his phone. "Dimitri didn't want to stray from our regular clients because of Sylvain and Ingrid's parents, but once we had a solid projection, it was difficult for even him to say no. We needed to bring in more high profile brands, and this was the opportunity to do it." 

"And they were alright with it?" 

"Hell no." He scoffed, meeting her eyes again. "Mathilde nearly kicked me out for suggesting it, but I convinced her with the campaign idea." 

Byleth had met Ingrid's mother only a handful of times, but the woman was fearsome and strong. She respected that. And she obviously didn't want to get on her bad side, but curiosity always got the best of her with Felix's projects. 

"Which is?" She pressed.

"NDA."

"Not even a little bit?" 

"Ingrid's mother would murder me in my sleep." 

"Well, I expect to hear about it…" 

"Will you answer?" Felix looked up at her with his piercing eyes, and she frowned. So, he noticed she hadn't been speaking in their group chats. But what did he know about her answering privately? The suggestion that she wouldn't answer made her want to argue, but she wouldn't. 

There wasn't a point. 

Just a few hours. 

"What do you want to eat?"

"You pick, I'm not hungry." She mumbled, continuing to draw on the counter. 

"That's the biggest lie I've ever heard." 

It was annoying he was able to call her out like that. Of course, she was starving. She always was. But being in the apartment with him… it was overwhelming. 

Going back to their old habits of ordering the same food would almost be overkill. 

"I'm getting Almyran." 

Of course, he would. Byleth couldn't help but sigh.

"It's better in Derdriu, you know." 

"Well, sorry to break it to you, but you are in Fhirdiad." He said as he typed on his phone.

"Smartass." Byleth rolled her eyes. "I mean, you'd like it better there." 

"I'm sure I would." 

_Maybe you should visit,_ sat on her tongue, but she wouldn't let it come out. 

No, that would be another bad idea that she couldn't deal with. 

It was bad enough she was sitting here leaning on his counter, staring at his long eyelashes illuminated by the phone screen. She wanted those eyes back on her. 

_No._

Prying herself away from those thoughts, Byleth turned to scan the apartment more thoroughly than before. She noticed several books were missing near the TV that was definitely there before. That, and whoever had removed them didn't replace them. It was highly suspicious, considering Sylvain's cleaning habits. 

If one thing was out of place, he had a tendency to get a little bit particular, not that she really minded. Kept the place looking nice.

But the apartment was awfully quiet for being after work, and it dawned on her that Sylvain hadn't made an appearance yet. 

Were those Sylvain books that had disappeared? 

"Where's Sylvain?" Byleth asked as she spun back around.

Felix stared at her blankly for far too long until he realized she really didn't know. 

"He moved in with Hapi."

"When?" She asked, completely taken aback. That was very uncharacteristic of the guy who claimed he wouldn't move in with someone until they got married. They wouldn't have gotten engaged without her hearing about it. Though, it _was_ Hapi. The guy was head over heels, and even if she wouldn't say it out loud, Hapi was, too. 

"At least a month ago, Byleth. Don't you talk to Hapi anymore?" Felix narrowed his amber eyes with a confused shake of his head. "I thought she was your best friend." 

Way to twist the knife.

Byleth slid her elbows further onto the countertop, placing her head in her hands. "I haven't been talking to anyone, really." 

"Why not?" 

An irritated sigh escaped her lips as she straightened her posture, grabbing her drink and peeling at the label to keep herself occupied. She didn't want to answer that question. There was no rhyme or reason as to why she'd completely gone off the grid for most people; she certainly didn't have answers for Felix. 

It was just as she told him when she'd left. She needed space. From everything. From everyone. She needed to figure her shit out.

"I've been busy."

Felix stared at her with a look in his eye that told Byleth he was holding back. What did he have to hold back on?

"You should really call her."

"Felix, we're not twenty years old anymore, we can message each other when we need to, and she knows that—" 

"She's pregnant, Byleth."

What did he just say? 

"Fuck off," Byleth was sure her jaw was on the floor now. 

He had to be lying.

"That's why she and Sylvain moved in together so quickly," Felix explained, leaning back on the counter with an arm folded across his chest. He was an awful liar, and she knew that, but still, she couldn't help but study his face as if he'd have a tell. Like he'd suddenly burst into laughter and tell her he was kidding as if that ever happened. 

He was dead serious.

"Why didn't she tell me?"

"You've been busy." Felix avoided her eye contact by taking a sip of his own drink. He obviously didn't want to be the one telling her the news and was disappointed she'd been so absent. 

Fuck, she was disappointed, too. 

Burying her face in her hands, Byleth groaned louder than she would've liked to. Why hadn't Hapi just called her or texted her with a message explaining everything at least? Something? It'd been radio silence except for the occasional meme or joke in the group chat as usual. But for Hapi to not tell her something this big. This life-changing. 

Byleth was fucked. 

She was fucked up for not reaching out earlier. 

"I'll message her tomorrow." 

"Did you even tell her you're in the city again?" 

"No." She sighed, leaning her head, on the one hand, to take a long swig of her drink with the other. Silently, she hoped Felix was well-stocked after news like that. 

"Maybe you should tell her." 

"No," Byleth said firmly, narrowing her eyes at him. 

"Why not?"

"Because she'll know." 

"Know what?" For being so smart, he sure was annoyingly oblivious sometimes.

"That I'm _here._ "

"And what's wrong with that?" 

Byleth looked up at him with a raised brow, curious if he really just asked that question. They both knew the answer. Hapi knew she couldn't keep herself away, and Byleth wasn't about to let her know she'd won that fight. 

Had she though?

They'd been relatively amicable so far. Far more than Byleth had expected. As far as she was concerned, all of their clothes were still on, save their jackets and boots.

"How's Sylvain handling everything?" Tumbled out of her mouth, following a sigh.

Yes, a change in subject is what they needed.

Felix dropped his amber gaze to the floor, shrugging his shoulders half-heartedly. 

"As well as you could expect from Sylvain." He began, huffing out the whisper of a laugh. "Hapi actually told us at the same time." 

A scene Byleth would've done anything to witness if she had to be honest. 

"How'd that go?"

"I don't think Sylvain said a word for at least ten minutes." 

"Would've loved to see his face." 

"I'm sure if you ask him, he'll show you the video. Caught it on the security camera." Felix gestured towards the camera in the corner of the kitchen ceiling. Of course, they'd managed to capture something like that— just her luck. 

Now, she only had to gather the courage to finally message them back after all this time.

"Was he alright after he finally spoke up?"

"As fine as he could be considering. I asked all the important questions while he was stuck in his brain, anyway."

She could hardly imagine the whirlwind of emotions Sylvain must have been feeling at that moment. Being close to him over the years, she knew his complicated history with his parents and estranged brother. People could look at his past and see all of his faults for what they were, and they are. His days of sleeping around and hurting himself and others emotionally was a rollercoaster she only got a glimpse of because he'd found something good with Hapi. 

But from the stories she'd heard, it was enough to know. The news must have been difficult. 

"How's Hapi been?" 

"She's alright. Taking everything in stride as she usually does," Felix shrugged. "I don't see them as much as I used to because she's been sick, and Sylvain is a worried mess, but they're both doing fine."

Byleth and Hapi had talked about the future a few times since they'd become friends, but she never saw far enough for all of this to actually be a reality. Byleth had never really felt called either way to have a family, where Hapi had always expressed a bit of interest. At least she had that going for her, Byleth thought. 

But still, she felt absolutely terrible her best friend from college thought she couldn't tell her something so important. And most likely because of something so fucking stupid like Byleth needing her space. Hapi would be that supportive friend who gave her what she asked for, and she was going to hear about it from Byleth once they got the chance to talk. No matter what was going on in Byleth's life, she wanted to know what was happening with the people she cared about. 

And that included Felix.

"At first, they were both terrified, and now Sylvain is messaging me one second freaking out, and then he's sending me pictures excited the next."

"Pictures?"

"They had an appointment about a week ago, and he won't stop sending me the same picture of a damn blob." 

"Show me."

As Byleth rounded the island, Felix took out his phone and scrolled through his messages. Perhaps it was the small amount of alcohol that made her feel so bold or the false sense of comfort she felt being back in the apartment she'd spent so many of her days in. Either way, she found herself leaning into his shoulder to look down at the bright screen, ignoring the familiar scent of fresh rain and pine emanating from his shirt.

Sure enough, he pulled up a generic-looking picture of an ultrasound. A black and white blob. Who knew what it meant other than doctors and the parents who cared about the tiny black blob. Or was it the white one? 

What made all the difference was the name at the top of the image. 

"Well, that's a bean." 

"Yeah."

"Gonna be one wild red-headed child." She mumbled, eyes widening at the thought. 

"I don't even want to think about it."

The more she looked at it, the dizzier she felt. 

"You still have something stronger hidden around here?" 

Placing his phone on the counter behind him with a roll of his eyes, Felix moved to the corner cabinet that held the good stuff. Thank the Saints, he still kept some on hand. As he reached up to grab a bottle, the hem of his sweater pulled up, exposing some skin. 

If it was like before, Byleth would've got in for a firm butt slap already. 

Or, maybe she would've slid her hands around his waist, fingertips dancing at the hem of his shirt. 

What she wouldn't give to run her hands over those taught muscles aga—

_No._

Shifting her eyes from that distraction, she folded her arms over her chest and leaned against the counter to look out at the large windows. 

Byleth's mind was spinning at the dump of information, finding it hard to believe they were even in this position. Just earlier, she was thinking about the time she and Felix had been complaining about Hapi and Sylvain needing to get their place together. Of course, it was years later now, but it still felt so fast. 

Now, they were living together with a kid on the way. And instead of dancing around each other waiting to make a move, she and Felix were dancing around the fact they were no longer together.

How did they get here? 

"Have they told anyone else?" She asked, swallowing down the emotions that threatened to bubble up. 

"I don't think so. Ingrid and Dimitri's wedding is in a few months, so I suspect they'll tell people at the reception since it'll be the first time we've seen everyone since graduating." 

At the mention of the upcoming wedding, Byleth was even more glad that Felix was pouring them something more substantial. The date had gone entirely off her radar. Was it really that close already? It seemed like just a few months ago that the couple was announcing their engagement. 

"You forgot." He stated, holding out a glass. 

"I didn't forget; it just slipped my mind." She narrowed her eyes as she took the glass from him, quickly taking a sip that was far too big. She winced at the sting of the alcohol going down her throat, but damn if she didn't need it to get through this night. 

How could she forget when she'd bought a dress that perfectly matched the tie Felix was supposed to wear because she was supposed to be a part of the wedding party? Byleth didn't even know if it was happening anymore. 

Fucking hell. 

"Are you even going?" 

"Yes. I'll be there." 

That meant in a few months, they'd have to dance around each other for yet another painful night. Would she be able to keep away by then? Would they just speak to their mutual friends separately like you were supposed to do in a breakup? Was that even what you were supposed to do? 

She'd never really done it before.

Felix cleaned up really nicely, too. Could she really resist the urge to mess up the wild hair he worked so hard to tie down?

Knowing Ingrid and Dimitri, a call was probably coming for her soon about seating arrangements anyway. They'd ask whether or not she wanted to stay at the same table. 

Did she? 

Of course, she did. 

But _would_ she?

Taking another swig of her drink, she ignored the burn this time. "Is that also why you're so busy?"

"Yes." He sighed beside her. "Dimitri, Ingrid, and her mom are driving me crazy." 

"Why?" 

"The entire project is on me, and everyone is preoccupied elsewhere even though they're all workaholics. I get pinged constantly to make sure I'm doing shit right, and it drives me up the wall."

Byleth hummed at the statement, putting the pieces together. Of course, he'd be extremely busy with all of that. Sylvain with Hapi, Dimitri, and Ingrid with each other and their wedding prep. That left Felix to deal with most of the further work details they couldn't pick up at the moment because of how hectic things were. 

It definitely explained the prominent bags under his eyes. The man lived on coffee, but it didn't seem to be doing a whole lot. 

Her mouth opened to tell him to take care of himself but promptly closed shut with the click of her teeth. It wasn't her place to tell him such things anymore; who did she think she was? And who was she to ask him to do something she wasn't doing herself? 

"Who gets married in the middle of a Fhirdiad winter…?" She mused instead, huffing out a small laugh. 

"It's cheaper, of course." Felix rolled his eyes, imitating Ingrid. 

"Well, I'll be showing up with long johns under my dress…" 

"Sexy." He deadpanned. "Are you bringing Claude?" 

Honestly, she hadn't even thought of it. 

Of course, Claude was invited to the wedding as well, but they hadn't talked about the date much. It would make sense for both of them to arrive together since they came from the same city, but so were Hilda and Marianne, though she didn't see them as often. She had to assume they'd all end up arriving together in some way. 

But Byleth noticed the way Felix was fidgeting with the cuff of the sleeve of his sweater, seemingly bothered by the fact. 

Was he really jealous of Claude? 

Why would he be jealous of _Claude?_

"We haven't really talked about it yet." She answered honestly, crossing the kitchen to lean against the island and observe Felix closer. Why was he so weird about it? Speaking of Claude, what in the world was he thinking calling Felix for her. "What the hell is Claude doing calling you about me, anyway?" 

"He was worried about you."

"So he called _you?_ "

Felix winced only barely, folding his arms over his chest. "You're clearly not talking to anyone else." 

"I wasn't talking to you either." She stated, and that hurt too. "And what, you both assumed I'd pick up?"

"He had a feeling." 

"Why'd you do it?" 

Felix let out a long sigh, clearly searching for the right words the answer her. It was complicated. She understood. She couldn't even really understand why she was standing here in his apartment, yet other than it was a place to stay, and Goddess be damned, she fucking missed him. But why would he want to call her after how she left? 

"It's not like I hate you, Byleth." 

The admission was crushing in a million different ways. Because Byleth wanted him to— it would make it easier to keep away. Because of the bullshit reasons she gave him, she didn't even really believe herself wholeheartedly. Because if he didn't hate her, she wanted to reach out more. 

Her arms ached to reach out. 

Instead, she lifted herself onto the counter, hoping the reduction in access to move would do something for her. If she couldn't step forward, she couldn't wrap her arms around Felix like she so badly craved. If she couldn't step forward, she couldn't hug him, or touch him or kiss him again. She couldn't ask him to touch her if he was all the way over there. She couldn't even if she wanted to. 

"You should hate me." Tumbled out of her mouth, feeling like her tongue was dead weight. 

"Sometimes I do." She winced at the admission, but at least he was honest. "But I can't hate you for needing time, even if I don't like it." He answered, raising his amber eyes to meet hers. Byleth wished she could run her hand across his chest or drag her nails over his neck to watch his pupils dilate into thin molten rings again.

Felix being understanding was infuriating. 

What was more infuriating was that he was coming closer, closing the false barrier she'd made between them. He leaned on the counter beside her, staring out the bright window to the view of the sunset cast cityscape. The clouds were finally parting. From the window, they could see the sun beginning to set beneath the clouds on the horizon, casting its pale orange glow just like it did in that picture of that Halloween party all those years ago. 

Byleth wondered if Felix remembered. 

"Do you remember my first Halloween?" She asked quietly, averting her gaze to the figure eights she was drawing on her knee.

Felix looked at her with a sideways glance before looking back down at his drink. 

"Of course, I do."

"I found our swords when I lef— When I moved out of Hapi's place." She explained. 

"You kept them?" 

"Stuffed in my closet. I didn't want to forget."

Byleth swore she could see the corners of his mouth twitch up at the mention. 

"They should be on display. Piece of art." 

Now Byleth was fighting back a smile. 

"Yeah, they were." She nodded. "I'm kind of upset you never kept up with Dorothea's beautiful makeup routine she started for you." 

"Let's not mention that—" 

"Oh, but it was so lovely to wake up to—" Byleth added before she cut herself off. 

Too much. 

Felix looked back up at her with so many questions in his eyes. Byleth wished she could take them all and give him answers like she should've, but what good would it do when they were already so torn apart?

"You know, you were the only person I ever let stay." She stated, looking back at him now. Something about his stare lit up, and she couldn't help but feel some of her walls come down. Felix saw right through her, no matter how hard she tried. 

"Hapi mentioned it." 

"Well, she was telling the truth." She continued, clenching her fist to resist brushing his hair out of his eyes. "I've never done this with anyone else."

"What is this exactly?"

A silence hung in the air as Felix gave her time to gather her thoughts. They'd vaguely talked about her relations before him, but never in detail. She never felt like they were a comparison to her experience with Felix. There was something utterly different in being with someone on an agreement of terms for fun and being with someone who wholeheartedly knocked her off her feet and turned her world upside down. 

Both were good. Byleth wouldn't have changed her time with the people before him. They helped shape her in a way, and she was still friends with some of them. But now… Well, she had a one-track mind. She already tried to push thoughts of Felix away for someone else like she used to, and it hadn't ended up well. 

"I've been with people for months, but once it was over, that was it," Byleth explained. "It was just over."

Felix observed her for what felt like minutes. She could see the ask in his eyes. 

Did that mean they weren't over?

When he was looking at her so intently, it was difficult not to touch him. Despite the heaviness of the question looming between them, his eyes flitted down to her lips for a split second, sending a current through her core. Did he want to touch her too? Would he accept it if she did? Would he pull away and reject her?

"It's over." She breathed, testing the waters as she reached out to pick a stray cat hair off of his black sweater. Byleth gently began to swipe at the soft fabric when it wouldn't budge. Was it an excuse to touch him? 

Maybe. 

Either way, he caught on. 

His amber gaze was glued to hers as she ran her hand down his chest, still pretending to wipe away the cat hair. The way he held her stare was causing heat to coil in her belly from the sheer intensity. As she brought her hand back up his chest, she slid her palm down his arm until she took his hand gently. 

The urge to draw their secret symbol to each other was strong, but she resisted. 

Byleth still thought about how silly and cheesy it was and how their friends still couldn't figure it out after all the years they were together. But it was a comfort when they were together. They didn't have to say anything out loud if they didn't want to, and it held the same weight as anything, especially around others. 

Even if Sylvain did loudly complain, _"what the hell does 'eight' mean?"_ always.

~

_"Is there a reason you're always drawing figure eights?"_ _Byleth asked, patting the hand that was currently drawing on her incredibly layered arm._

The two were making their way to a skating rink to meet up with friends and were taking their sweet time through backroads. Sylvain always insisted on skating at an outdoor rink, which was far too busy for their liking. As little time as possible on the rink was the best case scenario. They were in it for the food afterward, anyway. And the potential of drunk karaoke from Sylvain later in the night. 

Felix paused, pulling his arm from around her shoulders, and began to run his finger down Byleth's arm until he grabbed her freezing hand. It was clear to her that he was thinking about whatever he was going to say very hard.

She didn't expect such a detailed answer from such a silly question. 

"Eight letters." He mumbled. 

"Mm?" She raised a brow, watching him sigh. 

"Three words." 

Oh. 

It had been months now, and they hadn't said it.

But oh, she'd wanted to. 

Several times. 

She felt it in the heat of the moment when they were catching their breath in each other's arms. And in the mundane, while his arms wrapped around her waist as they listened to music while making breakfast. Even in moments just like the one they were in, walking down the street together, she felt the urge to say it. 

Byleth just didn't know _when_ to say it. 

It was terrifying. 

"Three words." She repeated steadily.

"You're pretty slow on the uptake, you know that?" Narrowing his amber eyes at her as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, Felix let out a sharp breath she could see in the cold air. Byleth had learnt to read his strange intricacies over the past year and a half of knowing him, but she wouldn't say they were _that_ obvious.

"I just want to hear you say it." 

Throwing his head back, Felix tried to gather his thoughts before looking back down at her. He reached out and pushed a piece of hair behind her ear, running his cold finger along the contour of her jaw before brushing his thumb gently over her bottom lip. The gesture made her heart speed up, feeling exposed even with all of the winter layers. 

Finally, his eyes met hers. 

"I love you." 

Hearing it was somehow still shocking, her green eyes widening at the admission. Sure, people had told her before, but it wasn't Felix. He didn't say anything he didn't mean. And he showed it in every action towards her, which left her no room for doubt. 

Byleth knew Felix loved her, and she loved him too.

She watched regret flash over his face before Felix let his hand drop and turned to continue walking. 

"That's all." 

She took too long. 

Fuck.

"Felix, wait—" She protested, catching the lapel of his jacket and tugging him to face her. 

His dark brows knit together as she yanked on his teal scarf to pull his face down to her level. Felix finally complied, his frigid fingers finding her jaw as their lips met. The taste of her mint chapstick permeated her senses as he stepped into her and deepened the kiss. If her heart could beat out of her chest, it would have already with how hard it was slamming against her ribcage. 

When she ultimately pulled away, Byleth pressed her forehead against his; their cold breath vapour clouded together in the freezing Fhirdiad air as they recuperated.

"I love you, too." She finally breathed out, looking up at Felix through her eyelashes. 

"Oh."

Byleth couldn't tell the pink on his cheeks from the cold or if he was blushing, but from the bewildered look on his face, it was probably both. Huffing out a small laugh she could see in the cold air, Felix slid his arm over her shoulders and pulled her in close, beginning to lead her in the direction of the skating rink once again.

_She reached up and squeezed his hand, beginning drawing eights into his palm._

~

The memory of their first time saying those words out loud didn't feel so far away when Felix was looking at her with his intense amber pools. Byleth knew it wasn't the same. So much had happened between that moment and the one they were in. But the emotions swelling up in her chest felt so familiar. 

She just wanted him in her space again. 

Even if it was just one more time. 

Byleth lifted his hand and gently tugged him closer, hoping he'd get the memo. Of course, he did, standing from his leaning position and placing their hands on her knee. Felix's gaze was harsh, but she could see the curiosity beneath it, the want to lean in just like she did.

She began to drag his palm up her thigh without breaking eye contact. His fingers extended, pinky dragging dangerously close to her inner thigh now. Even through her jeans, she could feel the heat from his palm. 

"Last time." She barely whispered.

"Last time." Felix agreed. 

"Rules?" Byleth's grip released on his hand and reached for his chest while he moved in closer. A small pang of guilt bubbled in her chest as the words left her mouth. She never wanted to set such hard rules with him, but they needed it if they were going to get through the night without going too far. 

Wasn't it already too far? 

"No names." He said, holding her gaze with seriousness.

One of her favourite parts was watching the hunger in his eyes when she said his name. It wasn't under normal circumstances, though. Difficult, but she could do it. Felix knew her too well.

"No names." Byleth nodded.

"No eights." 

"That's obvious," She mumbled, and his eyes narrowed, waiting for a real answer. 

Byleth could do it, even if it created a quick pinch of hurt in her chest. It was challenging not to slip back into it when he was settling himself in between her knees and pressing his thumbs into her inner thighs like that. 

A small shiver ran up her spine as she took in a sharp breath. 

Oh, she still loved him.

"Of course. No eights." Byleth nodded again, his amber stare flitting down to her lips, sending a thrill through her core. 

She watched his eyes trace the contours of her body as if he was taking a moment to remember her before leaping back in. Byleth threw him from her orbit, and now he was being pulled back just as she was pulled into his. Gravity was winning, just as it always did.

Even if it was just one night. 

Finally, Felix moved. 

Byleth's arms snaked around his shoulders as he leaned in, finally closing the gap between them like she'd been aching to since she'd arrived. His kiss was soft at first, his hand coming up to hold the back of her head as Felix pressed into her. It was intoxicating to be in his space again, every worry she had before going right out the window. 

All that mattered was that Felix was in her arms at the moment. 

And she wanted more. 

It quickly became more heated as his palm slipped to her lower back, pulling her hips closer to the edge of the counter until they connected with his. Four months apart, but they still fit together like nothing had ever changed. How easy it was to slip back into the motion of things, even after it felt like so long to be apart. Felix didn't have to speak for her to know he felt the same. It was evident in the way his strong arms gripped her tighter and in the urgency of their kiss.

His teeth nipped at her lower lip, prompting her to give him access. It wasn't until that moment she realized how much she missed how he tasted. A muffled whine escaped her lips as she locked her legs around his waist in an attempt to pull him even closer than was possible. Close could hardly be considered enough at the moment. She wanted to be wholly wrapped up in every way with him.

Felix pulled away first and dove straight onto her neck with his mouth, beginning to suck and kiss at the sensitive spot under her jaw. Just that alone was enough to elicit another quiet moan to leave her lips as her head rolled back to give him a better approach. Byleth could already tell she would need to patch herself up with makeup the next day, though she didn't care one bit. 

It was worth it.

One hand flew up to tangle in the mess of his ponytail while the other pulled nails down the bunched up sweater on his back. The way his teeth were grazing over the column of her neck had her arching into him, wishing the fabric between them would just disappear already.

How many nights had she dreamed about this moment happening again?

"F-Fuck." She stuttered, nearly breaking the rules they had just set. 

He tried to hide it, but she swore she could feel Felix smiling against her skin as he began to nip at her neck again.

That was unfair. 

Running her nails down his spine, Byleth's fingertips toyed with the hem of his sweater before slipping them under the soft fabric. Her palms slid over the smooth expanse of his abdomen, and she could hear his breath hitch next to her ear. It was a reaction she loved every time, her cold hands coming into contact with his warm skin. As much as Felix pretended to hate it, the way he kissed her afterward told her otherwise. 

His arms raised above his head, lingering as he held onto her lip between his teeth. 

As she lifted the sweater and tossed it aside, Byleth noticed new ink that had carefully been etched into the skin of his ribs. It looked like the linework of an owl, one very reminiscent of his cat. A sweet homage, if that was the case. An excuse for her to drag her hands all over his ribs.

"When did you get that?" She asked, touching her fingers to the delicate black and grey strokes. 

"A couple months ago." Felix traced his finger down her sternum, resting just above the middle of her breasts where her own new ink stood out. "When did you get that?" 

"When I got to Derdriu." She watched his brow quirk at the response. "Want to see it?" 

Felix took the opportunity to pull the blouse off of her swiftly, amber eyes trailing down her torso as he inspected the new art on her body. She knew he'd like it. She didn't get it because of him, though. 

It was an intricate dagger right down the middle of her sternum, and yes, it hurt like a bitch. 

First, his fingers came up to trace the new lines in her skin, carefully following the dark ink several inches above her navel. She knew what he was looking for the moment his fingers started tracing back upward with a small furrowing of his brows. 

"You covered your scar." He mumbled, sliding his hands around her lower back to pull her close once again. A shiver ran up her spine at the comment and the action, feeling his warm breath come into contact with her collar bones as he began to move his lips lower and lower down her chest. "Why?" 

It was a spot he had liked to pay attention to when he was ravaging her with kisses, taking attention to every mark, freckle, and scar on her body he could get his hands on. For her, it was just an off-handed scar from her childhood. It wasn't a big deal. But she didn't mind if he kept kissing her there— 

"Just wanted to." She breathed, biting her lip as he started pressing his mouth to the ink between her breasts. Her fingers threaded their way into his hair again, loosening the grip the tie had as several strands fell out of its hold and tickled her sensitive skin. She wasn't even sure when he'd managed to undo her bra, leaving her completely bare, but the brush of his thumbs against the newly exposed area was enough to make her stop to catch her breath. 

Byleth rolled her head back and held in a moan when his hot mouth closed around her nipple. As his tongue circled the sensitive peak, she had to lean back on the counter, keeping the other hand firmly tangled in his soft midnight locks. A tug on the strands still firmly as his teeth grazed her tender skin elicited the quietest of moans from him. 

There was something about the way he gave her the smallest taste of what he sounded like when she tugged his hair enthusiastically. He'd always enjoyed it, and she loved to indulge in the enjoyment. The way his eyes met hers when he released her nipple and slowly teased his way to the other side was enough to make her want to shove him back and have her way with him already, right there on the kitchen floor.

_No._

It wasn't like they hadn't already done that before.

And right now, she was going to savour his lips on her. 

It was the last time they were going to do this, and she was going to take every second she could get. 

The thought made her hands grip him harder. 

Felix's warm hand slid down her back, dipping his fingers into the waistband of her tight jeans. As he brought his hand to her front, his nimble fingers managed to undo the button of her jeans before sliding the zipper down. He very delicately dragged his teeth as he pulled away from her nipple, looking up at her for permission to remove her pants. 

Byleth lifted her hips off the counter just enough for Felix to slip her bottoms off, leaving her completely exposed. She wasn't expecting him to be so quick with it, but obviously, the desire was catching up to him too. The contact of her bare skin on the cold granite sent a shiver up her spine, arms reaching to wrap around his strong shoulders again. His fingertips dug into the skin of her thighs without barrier now, only adding more fuel to the fire between her hips. If only he could remove the stupid fabric holding him in so nicely… 

Oh, screw being slow. 

"F— Hurry up," She writhed impatiently, glaring at the smirk forming on his lips. 

Felix's hands moved up to her waist instead of giving her what she wanted, going for her neck with his mouth as her breath hitched. Finally, she felt one of his hands move, running along her stomach as his fingertips dipped into her heat. Her nails dug into his back, inhaling sharply as he gave her that sweet friction she was looking for. It was easy to tell just how ready she really was as he slid his fingers down her centre, coating them in her slick. 

She silently cursed herself for being so eager, but it wasn't like she could help it.

"Still want me that bad?" Felix teased against her neck, lightly dragging his teeth. 

_Obviously,_ she wanted to say. 

_No,_ she also wanted to say. 

Instead, she boldly grabbed at his front, firmly rubbing her hand over the strained fabric of his pants. His breath hitched before he leaned into her harder, pressing his face into her shoulder. 

"Don't act like you haven't been leaning against the counter trying to hide this for the past half hour," She whispered dangerously into his ear before biting down on his ear lobe. Her fingers fumbled with the button of his jeans, tugging hard at the zipper with a small smirk when she felt his strained breath against her jaw.

A quiet groan left his lips before he began ravaging her neck with biting kisses again. "Shut up." 

Felix quickly went back to work, trying to ignore her, and began circling his fingers into her sensitive skin, prompting her to bite back yet another rule. It was unfair how easily he managed to make her melt entirely in his arms. Byleth's nails ran against his scalp as he trailed hot kisses down her chest, sending her mind reeling. She was trying to focus on making him fall apart bit by bit too, but it was so difficult when he was doing that.

It was already so much. 

Every touch, she could feel the pressure building more. 

Was she really going to be that easy tonight? 

Did she care?

No matter how many times her mind wandered as she touched herself, no matter how hard she tried to not think about him, it never compared to the real thing. 

As he began to slide his fingers lower, a small whine slipped out—

And the doorbell rang. 

A furious growl and a string of expletives left Felix as he pried himself away from Byleth, leaving her there on the counter. The immediate loss of heat was devastating as she felt a cold chill run through her body. She had completely forgotten they had ordered food in the haze of information and… Felix. And by his reaction, he definitely did too. 

Byleth found her cheeks going flush at the thought of how quickly things had escalated, half-listening to the conversation at the front door. The fact that she was sitting there naked on his frozen kitchen counter did not help the situation. Her fingers came up to brush an incredibly tender spot on her neck that Felix had left, thinking that less than forty minutes ago, they were talking about their friend's wedding, and now—

How the hell did they get here?

There was a very disgruntled 'thank you' before the door slammed shut, and Felix was storming his way back to the kitchen. 

"Fucking stupid." He muttered under his breath.

She could almost laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. 

Throwing the bag of take-out on the counter across from her, his fierce amber eyes met hers in a way that made her body feel electric. Clearly, he wasn't done with her. And she wasn't either. 

When Felix shoved her knees apart, sliding one hand up her back and planting one firmly on her ass, all Byleth could do was hold on for dear life. Her ankles locked behind him, taking in a sharp breath at the friction of her core against his arousal as gravity did its job. 

"Not hungry?" Byleth teased, circling her hips into him. 

"Plenty hungry." Adjusting her weight in his arms, his grip on her ass tightened, sending another shiver up her back. 

She got the hint.

Byleth could deal with that. 

As her back came in contact with the mattress, Felix wasted no time before he was untangling her arms from around him. His hands were immediately all over her, giving her breasts attention by taking her nipples between his index fingers and thumbs as he kissed a hot trail down her stomach until he stopped at her hip bone. Byleth could hardly keep her pelvis still as he stared up at her, looking at her for an answer as he always did. 

A nod was all it took for Felix to take the leap and begin kissing more intoxicating trails down to her thigh, nipping at the sensitive skin as his fingers dragged down her body to knead at her folds again. A strained moan escaped her lips as he kissed closer to where she wanted, but he still wouldn't give. It was infuriating. 

"B—" His hand came up to press on her hip, holding her down to the mattress. " _You._ Stay still." 

"Hurry up." 

With a small shake of his head, he smirked, drawing a line downwards. 

He was evil. 

Pure evil. 

But the orange glow from the sunset illuminating their skin left her completely captivated. 

Felix used his free hand to hook his arm around her leg, placing his palm flat on her stomach to continue to hold her down. Frustrating, but she could deal. He was only locking her in more, which made her buzz with anticipation for what he had planned. Lips were pressed to her inner thigh once again as he sucked a mark into the sensitive skin. Another whine threatened to escape as he grazed his teeth over the new pink spot in her flesh, replacing it with the gentle pressure of his tongue.

Oh, how she wanted that tongue somewhere else. 

And she just about had enough with his teasing until he finally sank his finger into her, sending her grasping at the sheets. 

Felix's amber eyes locked with hers as he watched her expression. He knew exactly what made her tick, even if he made her wait that Goddess damned long. As he began pumping his finger into her, Byleth's mouth fell open, forcing her to swallow the words that threatened to come out of her. Why the hell would he come up with such a stupid rule like not being able to say his fucking name? 

A second finger made her glad he lived in a newer building built with thicker walls because if they were at her old apartment, they would have been interrupted by a fist slamming at the door by now. The way he curled his fingers at just the right spot was almost enough to send her over the edge already. 

When he added his mouth to the mix, it was a whole other battle. 

Byleth could barely control the sounds tumbling from her lips as his tongue worked her clit. She managed to untangle her hand from the sheets only to get entwined in his soft inky locks that had almost completely fallen out. The reaction of her hips was completely out of her hands as she pressed up into Felix, trying to bite back the urge to call out his name. His mouth felt so good on her, the way his slender fingers curled into that spot over and over. 

Why did she leave again?

"Fuck, yes," She whimpered as he sucked on her, causing her to arch her back and tug his hair tightly. That pulled own his own moan, sending a whole other wave of pleasure through her body. She wanted to hear that more. 

After he was done, she'd get more of it.

Her green eyes looked down to meet his amber ones as he worked on her, breath speeding up as the pressure started to reach its limit. Byleth couldn't help the way her hips began to rock frantically as she neared release before his hand pressed down on her pelvis with more force to keep her still. The restriction was maddeningly good, even if she wanted to fight it. 

"Yes, yes, yes," She chanted softly, growing in volume the more vigorous he got with his tongue. It was so close she could almost reach it, with just another firm stroke of his fingers inside of her and that final swirl of his tongue and— "Oh, fuck!" 

Byleth threw her head back onto the bed as she came, squeezing her eyes shut as the first shocks of pleasure coursed through her. She gripped onto his hair tightly, cradling his head to her as he continued to work her through her orgasm. Her fingertips wrapped around the wrist of the hand holding her down while Felix tried to keep her still. The intensity of the waves that overcame her was making her shudder, unable to control the way it made her press her thighs to his head. 

It had been too long since anyone had touched her. 

Felix knew exactly how to make her fall apart.

"Fuck." Byleth breathed as she started to come down from her high. Her legs finally began to relax, knees falling as she released him from her hold. Felix looked up at her with those wild honey eyes she loved so much as he pressed biting kisses to her inner thighs. It was clear to Byleth that he was trying to hide an amused smile. 

He was failing. 

"What?" 

Shifting from his place between her thighs, Felix crawled up the bed until they were face to face once more. The tie holding his thick hair back was completely gone now; only the Goddess knew where it could be. Seeing him nearly completely undone was always something she savoured, knowing she was the only one who got to see it.

Well, used to.

When their hips connected, he ground into Byleth as their lips met once again, pulling a whimper from her lips. His teeth tugging at her bottom lip sent her heart racing all over. 

"Fuck," Byleth breathed again, arching up into him.

"Is that the only word you know now?" Felix whispered into her ear. 

The heat that came to her cheeks was almost embarrassing, but it was his fault she was doing such a poor job at keeping their rules straight. Byleth saw the thrill in his amber eyes every time she dragged out the beginning of that word, not knowing which direction she was going to take it. A part of her almost wanted to break the rule just to see what he would do. 

But that wasn't how they played their games. 

"Fuck you," She complained, nipping at his jaw as she shoved his shoulder to push him off of her. 

Getting the upper hand, she straddled his hips and pressed his forearms down to the mattress. Felix was still looking up at her with a faint smug grin even though she was taking control now. He really thought he was going to get out of this easy, did he? The goal was quickly becoming to make him fall apart just as much as she did. Her whole body was still static from her release, and she wanted him to feel the same. 

"We'll see what you have to say soon, hm?" Byleth whispered, her breath fanning the dark strands of hair that stuck to the side of his face. The golden light from the sunset reflecting off the building next to them gave Felix a radiant glow she didn't want to take her eyes off of just yet.

Byleth peppered fleeting kisses down his jaw until she reached his neck, where she exchanged them for languid open-mouthed kisses. She was particularly agonizing with a spot right under his jaw that she knew he liked. Swirling her tongue over the skin, he let out a small sigh before she pressed her mouth to it and sucked hard enough to leave a new red mark of her own. His breath hitched, fingers digging into her sides. 

He would have fun trying to cover that for work the next day. 

Felix's eyes tracked her as she sat back enough to pull the rest of his clothes off his bottom half, finally revealing his thick length. The sight of him waiting for her to make a move as the sun cast shadows over the contours of his skin was nearly too much to handle. As much as she wanted to jump him right there, he deserved some teasing after what he'd done to her earlier.

Byleth kneeled onto the mattress, lightly running her fingertips up his thighs as she began to lean in. She looked up at him as he always did, with a question asking permission, and she saw the small nod. The flash of his eyes widening when she took his hard length into her hand was all too good. 

She kept her gaze on his amber pools as she licked a stripe all the way to the tip when he sat up. Impatient as always. Byleth's tongue swirled around the soft skin as he let out a long breath, tangling his hand in her hair as she took him into her hot mouth.

But it didn't last for long, because he was far too impatient. 

Shortly after she started, he gently tugged her head back up, sending a lovely shiver down her spine as he pulled her face towards his lips instead. Byleth couldn't help but smile into the kiss, which was a usual end to her attempt to please him alone for a while. He got impatient. He just wanted her. Was he going to say it this time? 

"What?" She asked between kisses as she continued to stroke him. 

"Just get on with it." He muttered, looking up at her through his dark lashes. 

Well, she had other ideas, too.

Byleth placed a hand on his chest to push him onto the mattress and crawled back on top of him, straddling his hips. She boldly ground her core against his hardened length, now without the barrier of the fabric, watching as his mouth fell open at the sweet friction. She bit her lip as a whine threatened to escape, but his reaction was far more fun.

"B— Agh. "Felix tried to watch as she slowly rubbed herself against him, but he threw his head back against the sheets hard, biting his knuckle to suppress a strangled moan.

Just what she was looking for. 

But she wanted to hear it.

Leaning forward as she continued to roll her hips, Byleth reached for his hands and intertwined their fingers, pressing them down into the bed with a slightly frustrated noise coming from him. Felix wasn't going to bite anything back if she wasn't allowed to either. How many times had she almost already slipped? And if their track record had anything to say about it, they were hardly finished. She was going to keep his fists away from his face somehow. 

His brows furrowed as Felix stared up at her with parted lips, grasping at her fingers tightly. She couldn't help but steal a couple slow kisses from him, savouring the sensation of her tongue against his as she stroked herself on him. Every part of her body was humming, ready to take him at any moment. The drag of her nipples against his chest as she moved her hips was already building her second release. And for all that talk about staying still earlier, he sure was doing a lousy job at not pressing up against her with his own hips.

Byleth kept their hands intertwined as she sat back up, earning a muffled groan from Felix at the change of position. 

"Hands on me," She insisted, placing his palms on her thighs. 

For once, he did what he was told and slid his hands up the soft expanse of her skin. The way he looked, lying there with his dark hair all a mess against the white sheets and his hungry eyes were enough to send a shock of desire straight to her core. This was well enough teasing; she wanted him inside of her. 

_Now._

And they didn't need to end up in the same situation as their friends.

Byleth smirked, reaching over to the night table. Fumbling with the drawer until she found what she was looking for, she brought the plastic square to her lips, ripping off a corner with her teeth. As she shifted herself back to slip the condom over him, giving him a couple of good strokes for posterity. 

"Quit teasing," Felix groaned, digging his nails into her thighs. 

Byleth repositioned herself, and reaching her hand back, she guided Felix into her with a sharp sigh from both of them. Goddess, did she miss that feeling. As she sank down onto him slowly, Byleth couldn't help but watch his face as he tracked every centimetre of movement, watching himself disappear into her. His amber eyes were wild with a newly ignited fire as she bottomed out, placing her hands on his chest to keep herself upright. It felt so damn good to feel so connected again.

It hadn't even been that long, and yet it still felt like a relief.

Felix bucked his hips impatiently, his blunt nails digging into her thighs as she slowly lifted her hips, watching that frustration grow. She hovered there for a second before letting herself drop back down with the sound of their hips connecting.

"B—Mm—"He stuttered, catching himself before her name slipped out. It sent an electric thrill through her spine to nearly hear her name. "You're such a brat." 

That was new, but she would take it. 

Much to his delight, Byleth finally started moving, rocking her hips as she picked up her speed. His hands roamed up her thighs and settled on what he could reach, pressing his thumbs into the soft skin of her waist while he pulled her down to meet his hips. She could see him struggling to bite back moans still, and that wouldn't do. 

"Let me hear you," She breathed between her rise and fall, earning a stern look from the other. When she leaned forward again to kiss him hard without stopping, he really couldn't resist, finally moaning into her mouth without restriction. Just what she wanted. The pressure building between her hips was becoming harder to ignore when he sounded like that. 

Taking his lower lip between her teeth, she lightly bit down before sitting back up. Byleth circled her hips enthusiastically, leaning back to use his thighs as leverage to keep her momentum going. It was getting increasingly difficult as the tension pooling at her core continued to build from the constant friction of him inside of her. Byleth's movements were becoming more erratic, and Felix took notice. 

Felix propped himself up on one arm, wrapping the other around her lower back to keep her upright. The new angle gave her so much more contact, unable to hold back the sounds that were spilling out of her mouth as she used his strong shoulders for leverage. His mouth encircled her already sensitive nipple, tongue swirling as she tried to keep her pace. Pressing her face against his soft locks, she was so close to reaching her peak again. 

Felix could obviously tell she was close because he started to help her out, lifting his hips to meet hers in an intoxicating wave of bliss. 

"Fe—"She slipped, not giving a fuck about anything in her desperation to reach her high. His fingers dug into her sides, thrusting up even harder before she finally fell off the edge. 

She threw her head back as she came hard, nails digging into Felix's shoulders as she held onto him desperately. The stars exploding behind her eyes perfectly mimicked the burst of ecstasy that overtook her body. She couldn't help but shudder as her walls clenched around his cock, causing him to groan into her chest. He was still slowly thrusting up into her, drawing out those glorious sensations that overwhelmed her senses. 

Byleth finally released her grip on his shoulders as she took in ragged breaths, pulling back to capture his lips in a hungry kiss. His fingers carded through her hair to push back the bangs sticking to her forehead, and she knew he was patiently waiting for her to recover. The desire that pooled between her legs was not quickly subsiding, only furthering her need. 

She _needed_ him again. 

"Please don't stop," She begged, tightening her grip on his thick locks. 

She could see the fire of realization light up in his amber eyes as her request started to make sense, securing his arms around her to flip her back onto the bed. A needy whine escaped her lips at the change of position, legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as he took no time to rest. His elbows rested next to her shoulders to keep himself propped up, hands finding their way to the back of her head. His fingers quickly got tangled in the mess of her mint tresses, much to her enjoyment. Byleth reached between the two of them and began rubbing herself to try to get there faster.

"Fuck, yes," He breathed, capturing her lips in a heated his as he thrust into her without reservation.

Felix had always been far too generous, and his only goal was getting her off again. That alone was enough to send shivers up her body. His intense amber gaze held hers as he drove into Byleth, lips brushing, teeth biting where they could at any moment. Felix was always like this, trying to get her there faster no matter what he was doing. It was both sweet and frustrating because she just wanted to see him fall apart and feel good, too. 

Byleth could tell he was getting close now, his hips growing more erratic with every thrust. His eyes closed in concentration, trying his best to hold out for her. She was so close, only needing just a bit more as his hips snapped to hers so frantically. 

Felix's hand suddenly untangled from her hair when he pulled her hand away from where she was rubbing herself. It left her confused for a moment until he threaded his fingers through her own, pressing their palms to the mattress as he thrust into her even harder. The intimate gesture left her trying to catch her breath, feeling the pressure building more and more while he squeezed her hand tightly. 

"Byleth," He breathed with urgency, his eyes snapping open as her breath hitched at the sound of her name. 

"Felix," She gasped as the white-hot pleasure took over, nails digging into his back as she held onto him desperately once again. Both of them quickly came undone around each other, uncontrollable sounds spilling from their mouths as they collapsed into one another. Felix buried his face into her neck to muffle his incredible moans as her legs tighter around his waist. His name tumbled from her lips several times while the shockwaves of pleasure continued to roll through her core. 

After all of those nights dreaming about it, nothing could compare to the real thing. Felix's touch and his voice, the way his fresh rain and pine scented cologne still permeated her senses as she pressed her lips to his shoulder, couldn't be replicated in her mind. The way they fit so perfectly in each other's arms couldn't be imagined. 

And the way he said her name. 

Her _name._

Both of them broke the rule, but she could hardly care at the moment. 

Having Felix in her arms wholly undone, a sweaty mess, face buried in her neck is all she cared about.

Byleth's hand slid up his back to hold his head, nails carding through his thick, midnight hair as he began pressing small kisses to her marked-up neck. Unfortunately, it wasn't long before he pulled away from their connection, pausing to look down at her. His amber eyes were wild, tired, and adoring after everything. Felix always looked at her like she strung up the stars in the sky after they had sex, but this time she couldn't ignore the sadness that lingered.

Regret?

She really couldn't blame him because she probably looked the same.

Pressing his forehead to hers as they started to slow their breathing, he disentangled his hand from her hair and released his hold on her other palm. Instead of drawing on her shoulder like he usually would, he opted for unsticking the hair from the side of her sweaty face, tucking the strands behind her ear. She instinctively began running her nails down his back, repressing the urge to start drawing figure eights all over his skin. It's what they always did after. They would lay together, wordlessly expressing their love, and she couldn't do that anymore. That would be a rule too far to break.

It was one thing to slip up and say his name, but a whole other thing to confess her love. 

Of course, she still loved him. 

How could she not? 

Byleth could only guess Felix felt the same when he finally rolled off of her, leaving without a word. The cold air of the room finally hit her, leaving her feeling exposed and vulnerable. The void in her chest was almost unbearable when he left, the reality of what they'd just done sinking in all at once. She was completely fucked now. They broke and let their walls down together again, letting each other in enough to do this much damage. 

But maybe he was fine with it. Or was he mad that they broke the rules they'd set? After everything they'd been through the past few months, Felix still said her name.

When he came back, Byleth couldn't read him as he walked up to the bed expressionless. 

"Come here." She whispered, holding out her hand, hoping he wouldn't pull away. 

They'd already made it this far. 

Byleth watched his chest rise and fall in a deep breath before Felix crawled back on the bed next to her. She repositioned herself to lay up by the pillows with him, facing each other in the looming darkness. The neon orange light that illuminated his eyes into fiery pools was quickly dimming as it came in through the window. She watched the sunset on his face; the bright warm glow exchanged for dark shadows on his skin. 

Byleth would be the first one to reach out, tracing the inked lines in his skin down his arm, focusing on her finger instead of his eyes that she knew were on her. Felix brought her in closer, drawing languid circles in the curve of her hip before sliding his warm hand up her back.

Neither of them wanted to speak up, and she couldn't really blame him at all. 

She didn't know what to say either. 

Gathering the courage to look back up into his eyes, she brushed his bangs out of his face with a small sigh. It was something she'd done hundreds of times before, but this time felt so different. 

What the hell were they supposed to do?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY, SO I’m gonna go launch myself into space now???? Cool. See y’all in a while. LOLOL 
> 
> Hope y’all enjoyed it??? Tried to be descriptive but also not too descriptive so some thoughts along with sensations u kno? Yeah. I tried HAHA. LMK HOW IT WENT IG? OR DON’T LOLOL I’M A NOOB I’M SORRY. @ me if u want but I might just scream bc I refuse to believe I wrote this LMAO 
> 
> It’s so very hard to control these two. They do what they want. I have no power. Also, I can’t stop them from being dorky sappy, and also stunted at verbal feelings. That’s why we love them tho, right?
> 
> me, yelling through a megaphone: LOSERS YOU STILL LOVE EACH OTHER JUST FUCKING GET BACK TOGETHER ALREADY JESSUS FUCKIN' CHRIST
> 
> Anyway, I hope y’all enjoyed it. Hope y’all from the felileth server enjoyed the random nuggets from server life in here lmfao. Thanks to Sayl and Mel for telling me it’s all good as usual lmfao. me catastrophising??? HAAAAA yeah right. 
> 
> K OFF TO PLUTO NOW BYEEEEEE.


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